A special kind of jizz .. fresh from a monkey ... what dreams are made of ... what you want the people in your company to be full of !... to have the power of greyskull.
Your a monkey jizzer - you are soooo good ... you are the best salesman around in this company !
A jizz monkey is in fact a job description and refers to the poor unfortunate employed to clean up the inside of peep show/ sex show boothes, so as said employee wipes spunk from the walls he is a jizz monkey. I suppose it's like the equivalent of being a runner for television or something. Admittedly it is not a particularly desireable line of work, but I hear it pays well...
Bill: 'Has Bob got himself a job yet?'
Ben: 'Why yes Bill, he's working as a jizz monkey down in the red light district'
Bill: What? He gets paid to clean up spunk, that's just fucked up man.'
Ben: It's a dirty job, but some ones got to do it...'
A Purple Jizz Monkey is the overly complex drink ordered by the d-bag in front of you at a crowded bar. Often served as a shooter, this drink is characterized by its convoluted and redundant ingredients, and is almost always ordered with 4 or 5 other equally impossible drinks. When the fuck-ram in front of you orders a Purple Jizz Monkey, this invariably delays your drink purchase by several minutes, and the chick you were talking to before you went to get drinks is probably already fucking some townie.
“Thanks a lot, Melvin, you took like 20 minutes to get our drinks and now we’re all sober.”
“Dude in front of me ordered like 5 purple jizz monkeys, my hands were tied.”
A person who is known to masturbate frequently, and is also and idiot, who is often unattractive like a primate, thus the "monkey". Other wise known as a freak
Jizzmonkey- I screwed myself over your milf last night
Guy- Ow thats disgusting you ugly Jizz Monkey!
Jizz monkey: 1. a person who is so addicted to having their mouth filled with cum, that if… that person doesn’t get their jizz fix, they go ape-shit! Hence, jizz monkey is a very miserable person,
2. the bitchiness that stems from being a jizz monkey
3. a condition of not getting the required amount of jizz consumed per day, week, month, etc.
4. an unhappy person (usually a female) person addicted to cum in their own mouth.
“Karen was being a total jizz monkey last night, after not getting what she wanted from me.
A Jizz Monkey is a stuffed animal, usually a Monkey plush with a slight slit cut into the bottom of the Monkey creating a hole for a man's weiner.
Greg: Dude why do you have this old crusty Monkey on your bed?
Colton: Dude don't touch that, that's my Jizz Monkey
Greg: Oh I have one too but it's pink not brown.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.
For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!