A loosely codified lifestyle that focuses on effective, ethical, ritualistic masturbation and sex. It could be interpreted as a
religion. Developed by a Grand Master Baiter known as
Sigma Card as he’s spent thousands of hours chronically gooning to keep his mind clear.
Holy texts include a bunch of bizarre sex fanfictions (A sort of goon bible if you
will) written in Minecraft servers, porn memes, images shared from e622, definitions on Urban Dictionary, and sex memes. There’s an oral law called the Jelqmud that only goonabbis can interpret.
Commandments of Jizzlam:
-Thou shalt not munt.
-
Don’t goon or eat the cum of anyone besides your Jerkmate.
-You may goon competitively any
time but you cannot nut in November.
-Do not waste your cum, if you’re going to spill seed then save it in a jar for future use such as a sperm bank deposit or an ingredient in
cheese.
-Do not goon the uncircumcised or with
men who can’t get hard.