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Ijo is a bitch that steals from you till you get bankrupt and does shitty things to you .
ijo by Oomban September 11, 2020
Words you can keep
the most loving, reliable, beautiful person you’ve ever met.
guy: who is that?
guy 2: that’s ijo, she’s my best friend!!
ijo by boobfart69 November 23, 2021
Related Words
(m'-ee-ho) Spanish. A contraction of "mi" (my) and "hijo" (son). Could be equivalent to m'boy.
Vamos m'ijo!. (Come on my son!)
m'ijo by Al-bear September 18, 2008
In Jesus’ Official Shit List

An acronym for the popular phrase: “In Jesus’ Official Shit List”. The acronym was originally a part of a larger acronym - HDIFTBIJOSL - which Stands for: “How does it feel to be in Jesus’ official shit list?” This particular acronym was rarely used as people had a hard time memorizing eleven letters and executing them properly without looking like a total idiot. Eventually it was shortened to, IJOSL.

Unlike WWJD (what would Jesus do) which is meant to help an individual make morally right decisions in difficult situations, this acronym is used to inform a person if he/she has done something wrong – something terribly, terribly wrong.

It has not been proven that such a list actually exists – but one can only speculate that somewhere beyond the incomprehensible spectrum of reality; resting on Jesus’ desk, sits a meter long list of names with the word “shit” capitalized across the top most part of the list.

Those unfortunate few who have made the list will not be invited to Jesus’ tea party – Which experts believe will take place just before the apocalypse.

Some notable people who have made the list:
.Hitler
.Kevin Federline
.Judas
.Bill O'Reilly
.Darth Vader(Jesus is a total starwars fanboy)
.Star Jones
.Kevin Federline (yes. Jesus added his name twice. It wasnt a mistake)
.The invisible man turned pervert
.Pontius Pilate
.Paris Hilton
.me (oh crap - what did I do to offend Jesus this time!?)
Oh Judas, dude - How could you nark on me man? Ok thats it - you are now IJOSL!
IJOSL by Narutard Worshipper July 28, 2008
Loop your iPod headphones wiring around nutsack and/or your one eyed trouser snake, ensuring one complete revolution around the gonads. Once the loop is secured, get another individual to continuously tug on the wiring, thus completing the iJob. iPod music is optional, but to receive the full effect of the iJob, play Celine Dion's "My heart will go on."

Caution: Some individuals have larger ballbags and schlongs than others, so longer wiring may be necessary.
Adam: Yo dude, check out this Florence bitch next to me, she is totally giving me the dirtiest iJob!

Matt: Bro, that’s my mom!

In class, that whore Marie gave me a philthy iJob without even knowing, she kept on tugging on my headphone because I was listening to her favourite Celine Dion song.

Hey dickweed, do I got a story for you or what...I was next to these two fine Pasadena mudsliders and I got the craziest idea. I hooked up two headphones to my laptop, put on “my Heart will go on,” looped both of their wirings around my moneymaker and got the sweetest double iJob EVER.
iJob by JBB2 November 5, 2009
An acronym for "I've jerked off to this" or "I've jerked off to that". Can be used in texting, messaging or a way to be more discrete around others.
"Hey Chris, look at that guy, IJOTT".

"Check out this vid, IJOTT", you should too".

"Here is my favorite pic, ijott"
IJOTT by JO Bud August 1, 2021
iJoke man
you Joke man iJoke man
iJoke by ok got it October 9, 2019
More from Urban Dictionary

Literally 1984 

Used in response for when someone promotes/advocates an event or idea that is perceived to support "too much" authority and/or government control.

Often used jokingly as a over-exaggeration in political talk.

Can also be used in response to a ban or mute in a forum site or online chat.
Steve: I think that the government should regulate businesses more
Bob: Literally 1984!

--User1 has been permantly banned--
User2: You cant ban my friend like that! Literally 1984!
Literally 1984 by ke1 July 7, 2021
Word of the Day on September 1, 2026

Back when I lived in upstate new york 

A meaningless, unimpressive, self-serving introduction. An indicator that the story about to be shared will be pointless and dumb.
Back when I lived in upstate new york, I also had to park on the street - on two occasions, we got enough snow, mixed with just the right plowing, that my car was lifted off the ground from so much snow being jammed underneath it.
Word of the Day on August 31, 2026
Acronym, meaning Too Long Didn't Understand
Similar to TLDR
Sister: This meeting was to discuss the rough draft of my essay, where we discussed the subsidiary questions I added in my rough draft. We also discussed the relationship between my main title and the real-life situations I chose to use in my essay. We discussed the structure of my essay as well, specifically the Math AOK section and how it relates to the contradiction of the title. This second meeting was particularly helpful in discussing the implications of my essay claims and how to apply the title across various areas of knowledge. There were many sections of the essay that could have been cut down in wordiness and the ways of knowing required further and more in-depth analysis.

Me: Woah! TLDU!
TLDU by L-Evans January 14, 2019
Word of the Day on August 30, 2026
the act of having anonymous sexual encounters with other men in public toilets.
Cottaging by greeef April 24, 2003
Word of the Day on August 29, 2026

Salad Days 

green inexperienced youthful judgement and cold blooded execution of those judgements.

Rashness with little concern of consequence.

Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare

"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."

- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
"How did you end up in jail?"

"Salad days, 'nuf said."
Salad Days by GilbyRFC0 October 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 28, 2026
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