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pokes my hemorroids! 

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'Avril Lavigne, Jamster and the New Mini all poke my hemorroids.'

Hemorrhoid

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1) noun: A swollen varicose vein in or around the anus, rectum or sigmoid colon;
2) adjective: A person who's both useless, and a major pain in the ass, in the most obnoxious of ways. They fall beneath the level of "asshole," because an asshole has some function, at least. A hemorrhoid just gets in the way of your life and causes pain for no reason.
1) I can't sit at all due to this golf-ball of a hemorrhoid in my ass.
2) Jeff is just a total hemorrhoid, that useless shitsack of a dickweed.
Hemorrhoid by Phuqit November 22, 2011

Hemorrhoid

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that dude is a hemorrhoid
Hemorrhoid by dhar woman July 7, 2022

homorrhoids 

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painful irritation of the rectal cavity due to vigorous buttsex, not uncommon among gay men
Whoa! Ian and I had a wild night of fucking, but it left me with a major case of homorrhoids.
homorrhoids by flyingdog March 31, 2008

Hemmoroids 

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This commercial for topical anus jell misspelled the word "Hemorrhoids" as "Hemmoroids." Can't they get their shit together, already? Fuck retards who can't spell a medical word correctly.
Hemmoroids by Bad C dev February 28, 2021

human hemorrhoid

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Someone who causes severe mental pain or extreme mental itching and can cause mental bleeding to the people around him and the more you try to help him the worse he is.
That bipolar craphead is a human hemorrhoid when he's off his meds. Give him a chill pill quick for all our sakes!
human hemorrhoid by chezo July 22, 2009
More from Urban Dictionary

mormon assault vehicle

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another term for a station wagon, mini-van, or any other kind of vehicle that is targeted at the "family" demographic(also M.A.V.)
"Tactical advantages aside, the M.A.V. is top of the line for the holy warrior troop transport manufactured by the Church of Latter Day Saints Military Industrial Complex. Also great for family trips...to heathen lands."
mormon assault vehicle by KVRX January 10, 2005
Word of the Day on August 22, 2026

Shakira Law 

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A version of "Sharia Law" that Reform Ltd supporters tend to refer to, often by mistake.
Richard Tice of Reform now lives in Dubai, under Shakira Law, although telling Brits that we should worry about it
Shakira Law by Reformltd February 16, 2025
Word of the Day on August 21, 2026

Overstand 

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To understand a topic or statement to the highest extent.
Leroy, after being told the tenth time by his sister, did overstand her idea of robbing the 7-11.
Overstand by Elf Eater March 23, 2003
Word of the Day on August 20, 2026

minimap 

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A map that mostly tells you where everything is
Friend 1: Follow me there is a player nearby
Friend 2: How do you know?
Friend 1: Minimap
minimap by LeWord January 13, 2015
Word of the Day on August 19, 2026

Pink Cloud

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12 step recovery jargon referring to someone new who talks about how great life is, now that they're sober. Usually meaning that the person is out of touch with reality.
The new guy seems pretty happy for a dude who has no job, no money and no family. He must be on a pink cloud.
Pink Cloud by toniwithaneye November 24, 2006
Word of the Day on August 18, 2026

Dotard 

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An aging individual who has long lost the ability to make rational sense.
That dotard is going to get us all blown up, if he doesn't calm down .
Dotard by anonymous September 22, 2017
Word of the Day on August 17, 2026
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