Hemorrhoids 

When your anus hurts because there's not enough fiber in your diet or you ate a ghost pepper or you destroyed your ass with a dragon dildo, causing massive inflammation.

What the fuck was God thinking when He packed tons of nerve clusters and veins into the anus area?!?!?! Didn't He know that people would get painful Hemorrhoids?!?!?! Didn't he know that I and countless others would be suffering to death at the hands of old age due to His poor decisions?!?!?!

Hemorrhoids by Bad C dev February 28, 2021

Hemorrhoids 

Bleeding from the asshole.

My hemorrhoids are stinging and have stained my jocks.

Hemorrhoids by Ausstralian November 14, 2007

hemorrhoids 

1. A condition that causes bleeding from your rear end.

2. An insult used to describe a person who is about as irritating as the anal condition.

Girl 1. You can’t sit with us.
Girl 2: Actually, I can’t sit anywhere because I have hemorrhoids.

hemorrhoids by Senpaiwaifu July 8, 2019

Hemorrhoids 

Ben's dad

Lol Bens dad has hemorrhoids

Hemorrhoids by Consie March 21, 2021

hemorrhoids 

n; A very annoying person.

Those people were such hemorrhoids.

hemorrhoids by kickasscristi January 14, 2009

John Wayne hemorrhoids 

The sound of large amounts of change banging against one's leg whilst wearing loose trousers. So named because of the similarity with the sound of cowboy boot spurs.

"I went to the shop this morning to buy a packet of Apple Hubba Bubba. I only had a £20 note but they had no fivers or tenners! So I've now got a pocket of Cunt's Tender and a very bad case of the John Wayne hemorrhoids."

John Wayne hemorrhoids by Skinbro July 20, 2008

I have serious hemorrhoids! 

A pickup line made from the gods.

You can put it on a mug and every woman that sees it immediately falls in love with you.

Guy: I have serious hemorrhoids!
Girl: Ew!
Guy: :(
GIrl: Im just kidding its so hot

I have serious hemorrhoids! by SpaghettiLover609 December 16, 2022