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Elf on the Shelf 

An Elf on the Shelf is an elf said to be sent by Santa, or from the North Pole, at least. They are said to watch kids be good during December, and report back to Santa if they're not. There are different kinds of elves, and they usually arrive between the day after Thanksgiving and the first week of December, while a kid is between six and eleven years old. They move overnight, often give gifts, and some are very mischievous. They sometimes come with Elf Pets, (either a dog or a reindeer) which stay all year but only move with elves.
"My Elf on the Shelf; Elfie moved into the kitchen last night!" said Clarissa.

Elf on the Shelf: Tree Rule 

-If a christmas tree is put up the elf get extra power and more magic.
-If it has been touched than the power rehabilitates and it can have an acception of moving again.
-the tree must be decorated only past 9 and have at least one child under the age of 12 to work.
-Santa will then give back the powers of the Elf and make it stronger than before.
- Don't touch!
-Put up tree
-More power
#Elf on the Shelf: Tree Rule

Elf on the Shelf 

While one person is taking a shit, he/she spreads his/her legs apart while on the toilet and allows another person to sit on their lap and shit into the same toilet.
Dude, I had to shit so bad and Eric was already on the pot so we pulled a elf on the shelf.

Elf on the Shelf 

An extraordinarily stupid holiday tradition practiced by white, suburb-dwelling families which involves "hiding" a creepy doll somewhere in the house, for their young children to find. This may seem innocent enough, but the real motive behind this fad is to attempt to control the offspring's behavior through the threat of the Elf telling Santa Claus of the misdeeds they committed under the omnipotent surveillance of the Elf. A adult satire of this is Whore in the Drawer, simply replacing the Elf with a scantily clothed Barbie doll, and the shelf with a cabinet or drawer.
Wife: Jim, did you hide the Elf on the Shelf
Husband: No Carol, for fuck's sake, I told you it gives me the willies.
Elf on the Shelf by bonquequeg March 17, 2016

elf on the shelf 

A very creepy tradition perpetrated by adults around children of young ages. The legend goes that the elf on the shelf is hidden and watches the children and then reports back to Santa with his findings. In a nutshell, this is Santa's NSA, with less phone taps. Although this may seem a jocular activity to keep your offspring in line, it actually is a pervy way to watch over your kids, using the threat of not receiving gifts during the holiday season. The adult version of this practice is not-so-subtly named whore in a drawer
Dad 1: Hey Rick did you hide the elf on the shelf for little bobby and Susie this year?
Dad 2: Hell yeah I did, Arty. I put it in the bathroom so my kids will shit bricks.
elf on the shelf by canned_laughs August 18, 2016

Elf on the Shelf 

When the penis rests perfectly on a large pair of balls
Saw this guy on come out of the pool with an elf on the shelf.
Elf on the Shelf by anonymous July 17, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026
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