by Baeslayer79 April 6, 2021
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Someone with a useful set of skills, especially a rare sought-after talent, that is completely useless because they are drunk all the time.
Example 1:
Rumpelstiltskin: I'm here to spin all that straw into gold and save the miller's daughter. Hey, do you have any meds for a headache? I have a killer hangover.
Miller's friend: Dude, you smell like booze. Also, she's dead already. The King hanged her on Sunday.
Rumpelstilskin: Awwww, noooo! Really!? But I can spin the straw into gold like the King wants.
Miller's friend: That would have been useful 3 days ago when you said you'd be here.
Rumpelstiltskin: Aw man. I'm so sorry. I feel so bad about this.
Miller's friend: Yeah. Nice job, Drunkelstiltskin.
Rumpelstiltskin: I feel so bad. I need a drink.
Example 2:
John: I need some help with my Calculus homework. Do you know anyone that is taking Calculus this semester?
Bob: Well, that dude over there has a Ph.D in Mathematics. I'm sure he could help you.
John: A Ph.D, seriously? Where is he!?
Bob: He's that guy over there in the recliner chair.
John: You mean that passed out guy sitting in the chair with barf dripping down the arm of the chair?
Bob: Yep. That's him. Drunkelstiltskin is a fuckin' math genius!
John: ...
Rumpelstiltskin: I'm here to spin all that straw into gold and save the miller's daughter. Hey, do you have any meds for a headache? I have a killer hangover.
Miller's friend: Dude, you smell like booze. Also, she's dead already. The King hanged her on Sunday.
Rumpelstilskin: Awwww, noooo! Really!? But I can spin the straw into gold like the King wants.
Miller's friend: That would have been useful 3 days ago when you said you'd be here.
Rumpelstiltskin: Aw man. I'm so sorry. I feel so bad about this.
Miller's friend: Yeah. Nice job, Drunkelstiltskin.
Rumpelstiltskin: I feel so bad. I need a drink.
Example 2:
John: I need some help with my Calculus homework. Do you know anyone that is taking Calculus this semester?
Bob: Well, that dude over there has a Ph.D in Mathematics. I'm sure he could help you.
John: A Ph.D, seriously? Where is he!?
Bob: He's that guy over there in the recliner chair.
John: You mean that passed out guy sitting in the chair with barf dripping down the arm of the chair?
Bob: Yep. That's him. Drunkelstiltskin is a fuckin' math genius!
John: ...
by Beavis Comeavis January 30, 2019
Get the Drunkelstiltskin mug.Any professional drinker who boozes beyond recognition and becomes the drunken beast of a horrific twisted alcohol-induced Brothers' Grimm fairy fable, generally taking on the form of a short, hairy guy who is convinced you are dying to fuck him.
"Fuck this, I am outta here. Drunkelstiltskin is staggering this way and he already puked on my shoes once tonight"
by Reginold Bixby July 7, 2008
Get the Drunkelstiltskin mug.by The guy February 2, 2015
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