Blandford

cunt.

Man: Watch out, you just stepped on my vagina!
Man 2: Fuck off, you're such a blandford!!

by ChrisBlandford April 24, 2011

blandford

Definitely a bottom, never a top. The S&M worlds whipping boy. More welts on his behind than a habitually naughty Etonian school boy. An ex-cozzer.

Six of the best please, sir. Ouch, thank you may I have another.

by Peldon April 5, 2004

Clockweight Blindfold

When in a 69 position with a guy on top, and his ballbag drapes over his partners face with 1 duster resting on each eye.

"Colin climbed on top for a dinner for 2, managing to position his balls perfectly on Edna's face for a well executed clockweight Blindfold".

by Woms1 April 20, 2023

Bradford Grasscut

When you are rancid enough to convince a pregnant girl to leave her partner so you can fuck her, then fraudulently put your signature on a (second) false birth certificate, then lie to the child "all their life" about who their father really is, along with your parents who you still live with at the age of 59. When the truth comes out 31 years later, you smear the real father with lies in an attempt to justify what you did to him. All the above puppetteered by the narcissist child's mother. True story folks. Fact is stranger than fiction.

Muzza pulled the Bradford Grasscut and lied to "his" son his entire life, in writing with a falsified birth certificate. "His" son is too busy pulling cones to realise what has been done to him - and he has in turn, done it to his own son. A bloodline lie perpetuated down 2 generations.

by ratsbackside March 29, 2023

Japanese Blindfold

A well known Japanese wedding custom where the groom sits on the brides head until his anus covers her eyes blinding her from all other potential suitors. This may be accompanied by a Fukushima Release Valve.

That was the most beautiful Japanese Blindfold I've ever seen performed!

by Penis Curtains January 19, 2021

Going Blanford

the process by which one removes feces with a makeshift device from an appropriate receptacle and forces it into a receptacle not suited for human waste removal

I was grateful the public bathroom had a window, otherwise I was planning on Going Blanford.

by Sink_Violator January 7, 2010

Tim Bradford

A Tim Bradford is a hot cop on the rookie. He's smoking hot and he secretly cares alot more so for Lucy and Lopez.

"It's smocking hot Officer Zaddy and best man" Tamara say
"Shh he could here you" Lucy says laughing
"What's a Officer Zaddy?" Tim Bradford ask behind them

by Chenfordalltheway May 14, 2021