Armadale is a dodgy suburb in
Perth, Western
Australia. The population of this area are referred to as "Armadalians". Armadalians are a tribal like
people. They have their own culture called "
white trash" and practice religious ceremonies such as "the chugathon" and "beer night". The armadalians live in tribes known as “gangs”. Gangs will commonly have disagreements with each other. These disagreements often turn into a “thonging” an event in which the cheifs of the gangs will stand in front of each other with a thong (shoe) in each of there hands and they will proceed to
hit each other until either one is on the ground with a brain tumour or they get
bored and decide to go to the pub instead. In the Armadalian culture there are gods like most other religions. These gods are apart of groups known as “footy teams”. These gods will battle each other to the
death in a gladiator like area known as “a footy oval”
Armadale is is wondered at by non locals and tourists who pass through the suburb. As it is location on the very outskirts of Perth - boarding The Bush - can make it look like a green, natural amalgamation of nature and city. However, much like the burgers in a Macca'
s commercial, this is miss leading as the trees, bushes, grass and other green shit mask the true, insidious nature of Armadale after the
sun recedes.
During the day light hours the Armadlians are quite tame. With only the usual robbery or murder. But during in the night the nocturnal Armadilians instincts take hold. No records of nocturnal Armadilians exist and all those brave enough to try and observe the creatures have been found
dead the next morning with injuries such as: anal penetration, cancer and extreme
paper cuts. This phenomena has caused the United Nations to warn
people against walking through Armadale at night.
Armadale is widely
popular for the safaris as you can observe the creature know as "Abo" in his natural habitat, drinking booze and bashing white
kids. "The Abo" is the other species that you can find in Armadale. They are similar to the Armadalians however they have a reputation for being far more aggressive and receiving higher Centerlink payments.
"Next stop; Armadale" - Train Announcer
Heart rate increases - passengers riding the train at night
