The
government telling
people to stay
home, stock up on rice and pasta and toilet paper. Shut the blinds and hide inside, and binge watch Netflix and video games for a while till the threat is gone. Its not very strict since you can technically still go out for “essentials” like toilet paper and pop tarts. Certain places stay open, but a lot of places close.
Bay Area government: “We are ordering
people to shelter in place beginning
Tuesday March 17, for the next 3 weeks in response to the Coronavirus pandemic sweeping the world”
Hysteric Public: “wtf?!? I need to go to Safeway and get all the toilet paper! Then wait in line at Costco for 4 hours to get all the Purell to fill a bathtub to disinfect myself and bleach to disinfect my stomach! (
Jk, don’t do that please. Bleach kills, DO NOT DRINK BLEACH!)”
Concerned public: “So it’
s like a quarantine? Are we allowed to leave our homes? What about our jobs? And the (insert something here) convention this weekend?”
Bay Area government: “Not a quarantine, you can leave your home for essentials. Businesses deemed essential like grocery stores and petCo (
dogs have to eat too) will remain open. Restaurants will have to close and do takeout/deliver only. Healthcare workers will continue. All public gatherings of like 10 or more
people will have to be canceled,
sorry. Also if you have to go out, keep a distance of 6’ between yourself and other
people. So try not to freak out”
