monogram 

a casual way of asking for one gram of weed

"How much are you buying?"-drug dealer
"I'd like to buy a monogram." -buyer

monogram by KWPHML November 18, 2011

monogram 

v: to place one's initials on the body (usually chest) of a girl using her own menstrual fluid. Typically done when the girl does not notify the man that she is on her period.

n: the act of or displaying of such an action

I was fingering Shirley last night and she didn't tell me she was riding the rag. So, I had to monogram her.

monogram by Mark Lawson July 30, 2008

major monogram 

Perry the Platypus and Carls boss. He has a bushy moustache. Doobie Doobie doo da

major monogram

major monogram by Doobie Doobie do da November 16, 2021

car monogram 

Made for sorority girls that find their bath mats, clothes, purses and robes were not enough to monogram; and so they put their initials in swirly letters on their car. Basically they want the male sex to know that they are like super cute and their initials look really good in swirly pink letters on their volvo.

becky: " oh my gawd did you see shelly just got herself a car monogram too"

chrissy: " oh my gawd yah I mean shes not even in like a sorority i guess all the cool girls are getting them now"

car monogram by ahndrayah August 8, 2009

Instant Monogram

The real name of Instagram, based on its components

When you separate the word Instagram into its component words, you get Instant Monogram.

Instant Monogram by Uncle Dimma May 3, 2026

Cereal Monogamist 

A person who eats the same cereal every day through the course of several boxes.

Phil: "Hey Kara, what do you want for breakfast?"
Kara: "I've been into those bran flakes for the last several weeks and I see no need to change."

That's a cereal monogamist.

Cereal Monogamist by MzBranFlake February 8, 2012

The Elusive Monogamous Slutsquatch 

The one (rumoured-to-exist) woman who comes off as a complete lady of the highest order, while in public. She encompasses elegance, grace, poise and refinement. She is compassionate, intelligent, and kind. She is incredibly fit and has the nicest figure a man could imagine. She dresses in a conservatively sexy manner and has great taste in clothes. She never dresses like a slut, no matter what the occasion (i.e. She does not take part in Slut-O-Ween, or wear yoga pants in public.)

However, contrary to her conservative appearance, she becomes a savage when engaging in sexual activity, and she will push sexual boundaries to their animalistic limits, but not go too far. Her natural ability, desire and skills required to pleasure both her man and herself knows no equal. No man or woman, who only knows of her in pubic, would ever even suspect that her animalistic 'other side' exists.

She transcends the proverbial 'lady in the streets, whore in the sheets', and is the female version of a sexual Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. Oddly, she does not want to sleep with any 'other' guy she meets because she is completely focused with pleasing her one man --- the man who discovers her true identity.

Background:

- Many women appear prim proper while in public, and they ARE sexual prudes in private. (no surprises here)
- Many women appear slutty in public, and they ARE slutty in private. (no surprises here)
- The elusive monogamous slutsquatch would both rock and shock the man who found her.

ex. I thought my then-girlfriend (???) was the elusive monogamous slutsquatch, however, I left her alone for a week and she slept with her ex-boyfriend. Then she started checking out other men and commenting on them, in sexual manner, in front of both her young daughter and myself (which is quite classless). Yeah, (???) was not the elusive monogamous slutsquatch, but we had some great and memorable times together while I was investigating the possibility that she was the one.

*** The elusive slutsquatch's existence has NOT been verified, however, some men have claimed to have 'thought' they observed her in both her natural habitats (in public, and in private). She is widely rumoured to exist, but sadly there is no verification. She could be caught right now, and no one would know because of the aforementioned attributes. ***

The Elusive Monogamous Slutsquatch by GlennyJ November 10, 2013