METing

What the NY Mets do almost every year. They give their fans hope of a playoff appearance early in the season, just to collapse later in the year.

Well, the Mets are METing again this year.

METing by AimeeLynn September 2, 2021

Meeting Tourettes 

When attending a meeting so bad, dire or tiresome that an inner urge to issue profanities spills over into your exchange with colleagues or meeting obsessed morons.

Chair : and now shall we proceed on to any other business?
You : what the **** have we been ******* for the last two hours, I am wasting my ******* life here
Chair : you have Meeting Tourettes, please **** off

Meeting Tourettes by Teraknor January 27, 2014

Death by 1000 meetings 

As the modern form of an ancient torture, death by 1000 meetings is defined as the annihilation of a project, action or ultimately a person due to time wasted in having to attend a seemingly infinite amount of non-productive meetings.

This is in direct correlation to the mathematical theory which states WORK = 1 / MEETINGS, as the amount of meetings increases, the amount of tangible work gets divided to oblivion.

Bob: What happened to the billion dollar R&D project that Joe was working on?
Mary: Death by 1000 meetings

Rick: Hey I thought you were working on that perpetual motion machine, why hasn't anything progressed in the last 3 years?
Jason: Death by 1000 meetings

Mark: Did you hear about the case of fiscal insolvency of a city over in California?
Ann: Sure did, yet another case of death by 1000 meetings!

Death by 1000 meetings by Max86 February 10, 2014

tex-mexting 

When you send photos of your junk from the restroom of a Chili's To Go.

I was totally tex-mexting her from the bathroom today.

tex-mexting by Dexhart January 13, 2014

melting pearls on my tummy 

Spanking the monkey. Masturbation.

"Well, I'll be upstairs melting pearls on my tummy if you need me." Roger on American Dad

melting pearls on my tummy by tibu March 9, 2012

mating press 

A sex position commonly seen in hentai and Rule 34 and sometimes porn. It is normally just the Missionary position (albeit exaggerated) from the view of the couple’s rear, with the added touch of the penetrator’s legs more up on the receiver’s legs for “deeper” penetration. It looks as though the penetrator is squating while in the position.

This position is commonly seen in breeding/impregnation kinks, with the receiver being skeptical of being pleased/fucked or just being cocky or superior, followed by a female egg being fertilized seconds within seconds of the penetrator cumming despite in reality taking several days or weeks of the woman to actually become fertilized. The receiver is usually crying out in pleasure as a result.

A similar position is the Pile Driver.

“Man, that view of the mating press really turned me on!”

“I did a mating press with my wife and she got pregnant the next day!”

mating press by El Fuckface October 2, 2018

Melting Pearls 

It is the process of ejaculation onto your own stomach. The resulting mess resembles a pearl melting.

I may be a little late for the party, I'm busy melting pearls at the moment.

Melting Pearls by Starxy June 14, 2015