BEARSTANK 

The best type of hardcore gay porn

Person 1: what should we do
Person 2: lets watch BEARSTANK

BEARSTANK by BEARSTANK March 8, 2021

bearstacked 

Adj. Hella huge and extraordinarily fit.

Check out that bearstacked killa on the incline press

bearstacked by K. Washington July 26, 2016

jacking the beanstalk 

having a long, slow wank

'He's been in there for hours Cuthbert, i reckon he's jacking the beanstalk again!'

jacking the beanstalk by TCourtzone January 19, 2008

Bearsnake 

A combination of two common football exercises. A serpentine, which requires those participating to jog across the football field using the horizontal yard lines as a path. Those doing a serpentine will start at one endzone and snake their way up five yards for each trip across the field until they've reached the other endzone.

A serpentine becomes a bearsnake when combined with bear crawls. Those unlucky enough to endure the pain of a single bearsnake will experience over 1,000 yards of bearcrawling back and forth across the field.

Because of the infamous difficulty of a bearsnake, the name has become a synonym for anyone who is stupid, retarded, socially awkward, or just plain derpy. If someone calls someone else a bearsnake it means they think so lowly of the person that their mere presence inspires the same pain as one would feel from doing bearsnakes.

Snakey (adj.) is used to describe people or things that possess attributes comparable to bearsnakes. It is not correct to say, "They are bearsnakey" or "They are like a bearsnake." One should exercise the use of this word in these situations.

Football Guy #1: Dude, I did 1/4 of a bearsnake yesterday!

Football Guy #2: Dude, no way! That shit's crazy difficult!

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Guy #1: I just heard from Tori that Jason prematurely ejaculates!

Guy#2: I'm not surprised. Jason is such a bearsnake.

Guy #1: Yeah, I guess he IS pretty snakey.

Bearsnake by TheAlmighty8 July 15, 2011

Jackin' the Beanstalk 

slang term for male masturbation

Little Timmy's mom was pissed when she caught him Jackin' the Beanstalk

Jackin' the Beanstalk by Cheezee_mann16 November 10, 2017

jackin' the beanstalk 

One of many euphemisms for "masturbation" (e.g. slappin' the salami, jack off, beat off, buffing the bishop, glean the obscene bean, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, waxing the wonker, greasing the guppy, shooting putty at the moon, and Rosie Palmer and her Five Sisters doing the Four Knuckle Shuffle.

Frank will be a little bit late. He's still back at his house jackin' the beanstalk.

jackin' the beanstalk by Frank Klaune January 24, 2005

Bearstantial 

adjective that describes the proper amount, size, portion for a bear.

Oh no, a bistro won't do. I'm hungry. PLOISE I need something more bearstantial!

Bearstantial by AussieGingerBear July 31, 2016