A combination of two common football exercises. A serpentine, which requires those participating to jog across the football field using the horizontal yard lines as a path. Those doing a serpentine will start at one endzone and snake their way up five yards for each trip across the field until they've reached the other endzone.

A serpentine becomes a bearsnake when combined with bear crawls. Those unlucky enough to endure the pain of a single bearsnake will experience over 1,000 yards of bearcrawling back and forth across the field.

Because of the infamous difficulty of a bearsnake, the name has become a synonym for anyone who is stupid, retarded, socially awkward, or just plain derpy. If someone calls someone else a bearsnake it means they think so lowly of the person that their mere presence inspires the same pain as one would feel from doing bearsnakes.

Snakey (adj.) is used to describe people or things that possess attributes comparable to bearsnakes. It is not correct to say, "They are bearsnakey" or "They are like a bearsnake." One should exercise the use of this word in these situations.

Football Guy #1: Dude, I did 1/4 of a bearsnake yesterday!

Football Guy #2: Dude, no way! That shit's crazy difficult!

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Guy #1: I just heard from Tori that Jason prematurely ejaculates!

Guy#2: I'm not surprised. Jason is such a bearsnake.

Guy #1: Yeah, I guess he IS pretty snakey.

Bearsnake by TheAlmighty8 July 15, 2011

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Jackin' the Beanstalk

slang term for male masturbation

Little Timmy's mom was pissed when she caught him Jackin' the Beanstalk

Jackin' the Beanstalk by Cheezee_mann16 November 10, 2017

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jackin' the beanstalk

One of many euphemisms for "masturbation" (e.g. slappin' the salami, jack off, beat off, buffing the bishop, glean the obscene bean, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, waxing the wonker, greasing the guppy, shooting putty at the moon, and Rosie Palmer and her Five Sisters doing the Four Knuckle Shuffle.

Frank will be a little bit late. He's still back at his house jackin' the beanstalk.

jackin' the beanstalk by Frank Klaune January 24, 2005

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Bearstantial

adjective that describes the proper amount, size, portion for a bear.

Oh no, a bistro won't do. I'm hungry. PLOISE I need something more bearstantial!

Bearstantial by AussieGingerBear July 31, 2016

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square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.

"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."

square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004

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Bunhead

A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.

"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."

Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014

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trucker's tan

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.

I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.

trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006

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kidulting

The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys

Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!

kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025

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Boffin

British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.

According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.

Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023

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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.

I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.

Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026

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