When one inserts both testicles into a woman's vagina whilst vigorously jackin' off on her abdomen, hence the name.
Just like Jack and HIS beanstalk, last night I carefully planted my two seeds and was Jackin' the beanstalk all over Mary.
by Very Wise Man February 10, 2011
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One of many euphemisms for "masturbation" (e.g. slappin' the salami, jack off, beat off, buffing the bishop, glean the obscene bean, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, waxing the wonker, greasing the guppy, shooting putty at the moon, and Rosie Palmer and her Five Sisters doing the Four Knuckle Shuffle.
Frank will be a little bit late. He's still back at his house jackin' the beanstalk.
by Frank Klaune January 24, 2005
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pretty self explanatory. An act of jerkin it, or tuggin the bugger. Otherwise known as masturbation.
Jon: "Yo, did you do your english assignment last night?"

Me: Nah man, I was preocupied jackin the beanstalk.

Jon: You been jackin the beanstalk AGAIN?!

Me: 3 times a day bro.
by J Benj October 12, 2007
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Euphemism for masturbation. Combines a verbal allusion (jacking off) with a classic literary allusion (Jack and the Beanstalk).

Variant: "jacking the beanstalk" This variant makes use of the full, proper gerund suffix of ing - making it the preferred usage form in public and at formal gatherings, including at work, holiday and family celebrations, and when talking with grandparents, priests, co-workers, neighbors, and medical professionals such as doctors and nurses.
Ex: I don't know why Eriq doesn't lock his door; this is the 10th time I've walked in on him while he was hunched over the computer jackin' the beanstalk.

Ex. She's out of town, so I've taken matters into my own hands and been jackin' the beanstalk like a shedevil in heat.
by JNinWeHo November 7, 2022
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