Poosturbate

To use poo as lube while masturbating.

My palm went dry, so I crapped out a quick one and just finished it with a poosturbate.

by R Pontin August 6, 2009

pasturbate

verb,to preach about God constantly when no one wants to hear it. I was in a chat room and someone was preaching, calling everyone names and stuff all in the name of God. One of the chatters said he was pasturbating again.

Can't Ted do anything but pasturbate?

by storm871 March 18, 2009

Padsturbate

the act of using an Ipad to view porn and masturbate.

Jimmy was so horny, he snuck into the upstairs bathroom and Padsturbated.

by Stonecartier July 9, 2011

plasturbate

To massage your own worldview by rejecting facts or other information that conflicts with it. To deny the validity of all worldviews other than your own.

"He refuses to listen to what other people have to say; he just plasturbates."

"Don't bother talking to her unless you like hearing plasturbation."

by JohnnyReb87 February 9, 2009

Pregsturbate

When a pregnant woman’s significant other is too afraid to have sex, so she has to masturbate to calm her large Lobito.

When Cindy reaches her 8th month of pregnancy she had to pregsturbate because her husband didn’t want to hurt the baby.

by MRK85 July 22, 2020

Plasturbate

Using an AI-powered sex doll to masturbate. Plastic + masturbate = plasturbate. Not to be confused with 'sex'. Gender neutral term.

After Emma left me I bought a plastic sex doll. I've been plasturbating ever since.

Sorry Mark, I'm going upstairs to plasturbate. You don't stay hard long enough.

by Penrhynpenguin3 April 13, 2023

plasturbate

Masturbating over a naked mannequin or 3d-rendered nude image, as opposed to the real thing.

What a weirdo... he gets off to those fake 3d-rendered nude chicks! He plasturbates!

by Ninth October 5, 2006