The Turtle's Kiss

When a man manufactures a dump so perfect that as it glides over his prostate it causes mild to moderate sexual release.

Bill: "Hey Steve. I did a huge dump this morning which was so perfect that I almost had a orgasm"
Steve: "ah, I see you have experienced the majesty of The Turtle's Kiss"

The Turtle's Kiss by Souper Rare April 28, 2022

The Turtle's Dilemma

A turtle has the knowledge of it's own shell, the protection from it, the comfortability of it, and the awareness that the comfortability can also be, or cause it's distress as well. But even with the awareness, the turtle can do nothing about it, as it is their turtle shell.

An example of The Turtle's Dilemma

The Turtle's Dilemma by WKBI June 22, 2026

Wiping the Turtle's mouth 

When you are trying to poo (shit) but the faeces gets lodged in the opening to the anal cavity, often known as a turtle's head poking out. When you can push no more, but the turtle remains trapped, wiping during this scenario is known as Wiping the Turtle's mouth.

Craig came back from the dunger and informed Jon "That was a tough one Jon, I just ended up wiping the turtle's mouth" Jon understood instantly.

Wiping the Turtle's mouth by Broaders September 6, 2019

turtle's itching the cotton 

When you have to shit so bad it is poking out into your underwear

Uh oh, I better hurry to the toilet, the turtle is itching the cotton!

turtle's itching the cotton by chunk a and ba dunka dunk February 23, 2005

'in the turtle sandbox'

Having one's nose bent out of joint; jealous, especially over introduction of another member in the household,turtle sandbox-related plastic green molded child's sandbox made by Little Tike's.

When the new puppy came home, Peanut was 'in the turtle sandbox' for days.

'in the turtle sandbox' by Sharon Burns July 6, 2007

the turtle is sniffing the cotton 

A statement made when one urgently needs to take a large dump. This is a visual reference referring to a piece of feces (the turtle) hanging out of the rectum, and "sniffing" one's underpants. This can also can be used to describe the moments prior to soiling yourself.

Brad: "Hey Alice, let's go have sex!"
Alice: "Hell no, after eating that egg salad the turtle is sniffing the cotton"

Carl: "Forget the roller coaster guys, the turtle is sniffing the cotton"

the turtle is sniffing the cotton by rimlover October 30, 2010

commanding administrative executive officer of the amphibious turtle smurfs 

an elderly nigga with a 3rd grade education whom is accountable for all slow walking, fast swimming niggas from the south atlantic.

shazaam went to talk to jamel the commanding administrative executive officer of the amphibious turtle smurfs to find out about an open postion to join the useless squad.

commanding administrative executive officer of the amphibious turtle smurfs by shnarf May 26, 2008