spanglewank 

Verb,

A stupid or obnoxious person. Often used on Twitter preceded by a hashtag. Plural: Spanglewanks

"I've been accused of ruining a market traders livelihood, been yelled at, called a #spanglewank, and blamed for people not being able to pay the rent or mortgage! It's not fair I'm saving the world"

"Oi Spanglewank, where's me fags?"

spanglewank by ALT-F4 October 9, 2019

Stranglewank 

The act of dying by strangulation and masturbating (wanking) at the same time.

Invented and performed the first and last time by David Carradine of Kung-Fu/Kill Bill/Death Race 2000 fame.

David Carradine died during stranglewanking on the 3rd of June 2009.

RIP David.

Stranglewank by Janez June 6, 2009

spanglemonkey 

Spider monkey + Glue + Glitter + Glass beads = fun

I played with my spanglemonkey all day until he choked on a bead and died.

spanglemonkey by Anonymous October 16, 2003

spanglemonkey 

UK usage:-
To wank, masterbate, self abuse, act like Onan etc.

Comes from spangle- to add glitter / cum, and monkey - the male member.

I've got a hard on so I'm gonna spanglemonkey.

spanglemonkey by black flag June 27, 2004

Shpanglewanked 

Very excitedly confused

The situation had her so shpanglewanked that she got married to her camel

Shpanglewanked by Funintraffik July 17, 2022

spanglemonkey 

the name of Captain Spanglemonkey, a man often referred to when one is stoned in Meigle

ARRRRR, it be's Captain Spanglemonkey

spanglemonkey by bob October 9, 2003