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shemorrhoid 

Any person pathologically obsessed with their own ridiculous and worthless ideological judgments of language conventions which pertain (even only historically or figuratively) to sex or gender who makes a public nuisance of themselves by injecting their bullshit (as defined by H. Frankfurt) into even the most friendly and harmless conversation where they see a 'hot-button' word that sends them off into a tangential rant to "raise awareness" of their "deep" and "significant" revelations of our vocabulary and its supposedly important implications.

Symptoms include: an abnormally enlarged interest in vain masturbatory academics (such as "gender studies"); an inflamed sense of self-righteousness; irritating intellectually-vacuous outcries; a severely diminished capacity to defend opinions by reason; and disruption of normal social interactions prompted by the obsession.

Word origins: a counterstroke to the pseudo-intellectual nuisance feminists and their coinage "herstory" (a play on the word 'history', which they hysterically misjudged as androcentric): 'hemorrhoids' are a literal pain in the ass; a 'shemorrhoid' is one of the aforementioned obnoxious self-important people who is a figurative pain-in-the-ass (even in the eyes of the quasi-sensible feminists who resemble mature adults in their ability to offer arguments, coolly opening a discussion, instead of only interjecting to complain and make unreasonable demands).
person Z: having a good day?
person Y: meh. this weather is a bitch, and my boss was being a real cunt, today. You?
person X: OMG did you just say 'cunt'?
person Y: why?
person X: that's a vile word. I find it offensive. it's derisive of women and blah blah blah...
person Y: what're you on about? If I had, instead, said he was being a dickhead, I don't think anyone would complain that all penised people (of whatever gender identity) are being insulted.
person Z: lol, best to just ignore the shemorrhoid, person Y, they're only going to whine and protest for you to change your behavior, and they'll only become more rancorous if you don't bow to their self-imagined authority.
shemorrhoid by Lykho October 31, 2011
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Hemorrhoid

1) noun: A swollen varicose vein in or around the anus, rectum or sigmoid colon;
2) adjective: A person who's both useless, and a major pain in the ass, in the most obnoxious of ways. They fall beneath the level of "asshole," because an asshole has some function, at least. A hemorrhoid just gets in the way of your life and causes pain for no reason.
1) I can't sit at all due to this golf-ball of a hemorrhoid in my ass.
2) Jeff is just a total hemorrhoid, that useless shitsack of a dickweed.
Hemorrhoid by Phuqit November 22, 2011

Chemorrhoid 

A believer in the 'chemtrails' hoax who refuses to acknowledge established science while relying totally on YouTube for information. Identifiable by calling those who point out scientific reality names like "troll", "shill" and "disinformation agent".
That guy who is afraid of clouds and thinks the government is spraying everyone with poison in plain view is a real chemorrhoid.
Chemorrhoid by Lizoir August 26, 2013

Hemorrhoid

Swollen veins in or outside the anus
that dude is a hemorrhoid
Hemorrhoid by dhar woman July 7, 2022

human hemorrhoid

Someone who causes severe mental pain or extreme mental itching and can cause mental bleeding to the people around him and the more you try to help him the worse he is.
That bipolar craphead is a human hemorrhoid when he's off his meds. Give him a chill pill quick for all our sakes!
human hemorrhoid by chezo July 22, 2009

hemorrhoid miner 

Man them hemorroid miners love to wear them assless chaps.
hemorrhoid miner by Phtchnce January 5, 2005

Hemorrhoids 

When your anus hurts because there's not enough fiber in your diet or you ate a ghost pepper or you destroyed your ass with a dragon dildo, causing massive inflammation.
What the fuck was God thinking when He packed tons of nerve clusters and veins into the anus area?!?!?! Didn't He know that people would get painful Hemorrhoids?!?!?! Didn't he know that I and countless others would be suffering to death at the hands of old age due to His poor decisions?!?!?!
Hemorrhoids by Bad C dev February 28, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary

Soul digger

A man who dates women with the sole purpose of exploiting their time, energy, and labor while he sucks the joy and happiness from their lives.
"That guy's a soul digger. He'll expect you to work full time, but you'll be doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, and childcare while he plays video games or watches TV."
Soul digger by anonymous November 11, 2026
Word of the Day on November 11, 2026

pod person 

A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005
Word of the Day on November 10, 2026
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.

Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.

A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.

A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026

No Surprises Wedding

A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.

This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.

Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
"Hey, see that chick over there? She's pretty enough to be an ulzzang. :D"
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026
EBK stands for "Elite Ball Knowledge." 1 In internet slang, "ball knowledge" originally referred to a deep understanding of football/soccer or basketball, but it has evolved into a broader term for having a highly sophisticated, deep, or niche understanding of any specific topic (such as music, movies, or subcultures).
Person A: "That scene was a direct homage to an unreleased 1982 Japanese indie film."
Person B: "Wow, EBK."
EBK by silwhett November 5, 2026
Word of the Day on November 6, 2026
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