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pensioners slap 

A poor substitute for a shower when cold water is used to pat under the arms, between the legs and on the face.
Did you have a shower this morning? Nah, couldn't be arsed. I just had a pensioners slap.

pensioners piano 

A slots or pokies machine. Where pensioners go to spend their time before they kick the bucket.
Going to knock off work early and hit up the pensioners piano....you in?
pensioners piano by Mike Dibble April 27, 2020

Pensioners pad 

A house or apartment where two pensioners or more reside, where frequent parties, drinking and cooking is usally involved. Above-mentioned residencies are usually well maintained, level-floored and perfectly equipped.
Peter sold his house in the suburbs after retirering from the military and bought him and his wife a big ass pensioners pad.
Pensioners pad by RJKIXS August 29, 2023

Pensioner Pants 

Baggy trousers worn by old people. The waist is usually elasticated because the wearer has arthritic fingers incapable of fastening buttons and zips. The decrepit bag-wearer always forgets to wash these repulsive garments which end up smelling like a Paki's toilet on a particularly bad day. Pensioner Pants are very popular with obese, long-past-it security guards who bore you to death with tales of their holidays in South Africa.
Good God! Look at Pork Scotch! What's the old twat wearing now?

They're his Pensioner Pants. Had them since 1973 and never washed them.
pensioner
An old guy who receives money for just being around a long time.
The pensioner is a useless old man.
pensioner by Apple Cider May 13, 2005

old age pensioner 

miserable tight old cunt who cant afford to buy a round of beer
person 1: oi its your round
person 2: i cant afford this im a old age pensioner
old age pensioner by vWarspite August 12, 2022
More from Urban Dictionary

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026
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