pensioner

pensioner
An old guy who receives money for just being around a long time.

The pensioner is a useless old man.

by Apple Cider May 13, 2005

Pensioner

A pensioner is a old duffer who takes barley enough money to live and the popular show still game a legendary show and just be careful if there sleeping

Person 1: hawl is that old pensioner sleeping or is he deed
Person 2: al check SHES STEALING YOUR PENSION!!
Pensioner: huh whos there

Person 2: naw hes fine

by Steve not stephe January 11, 2020

Pensioner Pants

Baggy trousers worn by old people. The waist is usually elasticated because the wearer has arthritic fingers incapable of fastening buttons and zips. The decrepit bag-wearer always forgets to wash these repulsive garments which end up smelling like a Paki's toilet on a particularly bad day. Pensioner Pants are very popular with obese, long-past-it security guards who bore you to death with tales of their holidays in South Africa.

Good God! Look at Pork Scotch! What's the old twat wearing now?

They're his Pensioner Pants. Had them since 1973 and never washed them.

by Flappy Dickwad June 3, 2009

pensioner's leg

A thin, pale, knobbly, veiny penis.

by Anonymous September 2, 2003

pensioner porn

A type of erotica, usually in the form of a romance novel or story, which to most under the age of sixty five, is just some lame smut, but to a pensioner, it is the sexiest thing since short legged drawers.

Harold: Hey Beth, did you hear that Jackie Collins wrote a new book?
Beth: Oh yeah Harold, she's my favourite pensioner porn author!

by Johann Sebastian Snuff March 14, 2021

old age pensioner

miserable tight old cunt who cant afford to buy a round of beer

person 1: oi its your round
person 2: i cant afford this im a old age pensioner

by vWarspite August 12, 2022

Misplaced Pensioner

A game for multiple people where one person takes a confused OAP and leaves them somewhere random. It's up to the others to find the Pensioner before they starve to death.

Steve: How's your grandad?
Dave: Didn't you hear? We were playing Misplaced Pensioner and just didn't get to him in time

by IDrinkAndKnowThings June 21, 2023