A small white moustache sported by bald security guards to prove they can grow hair. If the security guard is particularly old, fat and ugly he'll believe his moustache makes him good looking and suave.

Who's the gimp with the Pork Scotch Moustache?

That's Pork Scotch, the fat, ugly security guard.

by flappy dickwad May 6, 2009

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Moustachery

Noun. 1. Activities or shenanigans most commonly associated with people adorning any number of face ornaments (moustaches) and usually associated with alcohol and/or a lack of pants. 2. A local establishment or residence where clientele are known for sporting mustaches and speaking of ridiculous sexual escapades that may or may not be true.

1. I've had enough of this moustachery, put your pants back on! 2. We decided to retreat to Charles's moustachery, so that Richard could elaborate on his most recent sexual exploits in the Philippines.

by theironpig January 12, 2010

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kellers moustache

1. A KELLERS MOUSTACHE is when a male performs oral copulation upon another man, in a manner that is more homoerotic than normal homosexual acts.

2. A mustachioed gentleman who has an insatiable craving for the taste of another man's ejaculate.

I couldn't afford any more points on my license so I had to give the cop with the German accent a Kellers Moustache.

by Espaldas Rompio February 16, 2017

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