Skip to main content

Maintenance 

in reference to a hand-job, (aka handie)
handy-man does mantenance.
we couldn't fuck because her mom was awake in the next room, so i let her give me some maintenance.
Maintenance by chuck_diesel January 21, 2008

Maintenance Wank

When you're participating in nofap and you begin to over sexualise things, like apple pies and peanut butter sandwhiches, it's time for a maintenance wank. This keeps your inner sexual deviant at bay, while also reducing the amount of awkward boners you might experience.
Guy 1: "I keep getting stiffies when I see anything that vaguely resembles titties or a vagina, it's killing me."
Guy 2: "Mate, it's time for a maintenance wank. If you don't let off some pressure, your dick is going to take over."
Maintenance Wank by Zima69err July 13, 2016

Maintenance Cocktail 

Spirits generally mixed with some sort of fruit juice and normally consumed in the late morning and/or early afternoon to help alleviate a particularly nasty hangover. Standard versions include Vodka/Cranberry, Screwdrivers, left over Hard Seltzers, and of course the Danimal. Also known as a Breakfast Cocktail when in Maui, a Maintenance Cocktail is essential for anyone who needs to rally and is eager to start working on the next day’s hangover.
Dave: Woof, I think we went a little overboard on the Peach Daiquiris last night..

Yoko: That’s why I stuck with white wine all night like a boss.

Dave: Good for you. I need to screw my head back on with a Maintenance Cocktail. Pass me the Gin and Tang.

maintenance call 

Periodic phone calls placed to one's significant other when out for a prolonged period of time (eg 4 hours or more) with friends. The periodic phone call is intentionally structured to prevent a blow-up or fight after the outing is concluded, which would invariably take ten times longer to resolve that the time to place a brief check-in call.
"Hey, let me put in a maintenance call to my woman, before we go into the bar."
maintenance call by RFsquash January 8, 2012

maintenance like

You like a picture or a post on facebook made by a someone that you might want to date someday or eventually just to stay in contact with her/him. A very low effort way to make sure that your target gets notice on facebook or probably even a notice on her/his cellphone that you still follow her/his activities.
Q: That chick whose new profile picture you liked on facbook yesterday is friggin hot
A: Yeah, just gave her a maintenance like to make sure to hook up with her someday
maintenance like by fotzk February 19, 2012

maintenance fap 

You're at a point in your life, bored and unmotivated, no girlfriend, and you fap even though you don't really want to just because you know if you don't you'll probably have a wet dream.
maintenance fap by eyeballcutter December 18, 2012