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jerk smirk 

The look a guy gets on his face while masturbating. Most males get a jerk smirk on their face because of the uncontrollable pleasure they are feeling. A jerk smirk can last for several minutes after a guy ejaculates.
Duder 1: "Hurry up in there dude, I gotta trim my bush."

Duder 2: (comes out of bathroom) "Sorry dude, it's all yours."

Duder 1: "What the hell is that jerk smirk on your face for? Awww dude if I step on any of your nasty ass cum..."
jerk smirk by westfalia December 29, 2009
Urban Dictionary Merch

smirk jerk 

An person who frequently fakes a smile with an arrogant, smug attitude.
Rachel is such a smirk jerk! She always gives me that same smug look every time I screw something up.
smirk jerk by zeus64 April 12, 2011

jerk em' then smirk em' 

to jerk someone off while creepily smiling at them as doing so. to the point where they are uncomfortable by the creepiness and call it a day.

comes from the group of phrases
"fuck em' then chuck em'" "blow em' then throw em'" "hit and run" "hit it then quit it"
Amanda: so what did you and hannah do last night?

Brandon: well we were getting into it untill she pulled a jerk em' then smirk em' and it just creeped me out so i left without even finishing.

Amanda: ewww.

smirk-and-jerk 

(v.) to roll one's eyes whilst concurrently simulating (male) masturbation , used whenever one encounters absolute douche-baggery or ridiculous-ness.

"I was TOTALLY pulling a smirk-and-jerk as my ex was telling me over the phone how he didn't miss me at all when my phone's missed call log proved otherwise."
smirk-and-jerk by belleofthebaltimore September 28, 2006

shirk jerk 

A way of neck-fucking someone by having them shrug their shoulder whilst you slide your dick in the space between the shoulder and side of head.

For when you get a kink in your neck.
Alexis Texas, if it doesn’t feel good, why would you still want to shirk jerk me?
shirk jerk by yabig March 2, 2020

Shirk and Jerk

To avoid doing work while on the clock whilst taking care of one's needs. Less euphemistically: to jack off at work.
I was feeling really stressed at work today, so I locked my office and closed the blinds for a good ol' shirk and jerk to relieve my tension before the board meeting. Totally killed the presentation!
More from Urban Dictionary
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026
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