smirk-and-jerk

(v.) to roll one's eyes whilst concurrently simulating (male) masturbation , used whenever one encounters absolute douche-baggery or ridiculous-ness.

"I was TOTALLY pulling a smirk-and-jerk as my ex was telling me over the phone how he didn't miss me at all when my phone's missed call log proved otherwise."

by belleofthebaltimore September 28, 2006

Shirk and Jerk

To avoid doing work while on the clock whilst taking care of one's needs. Less euphemistically: to jack off at work.

I was feeling really stressed at work today, so I locked my office and closed the blinds for a good ol' shirk and jerk to relieve my tension before the board meeting. Totally killed the presentation!

by daphunkeefeel1 July 8, 2012