jacking the beanstalk 

having a long, slow wank

'He's been in there for hours Cuthbert, i reckon he's jacking the beanstalk again!'

jacking the beanstalk by TCourtzone January 19, 2008

Jackin' the Beanstalk 

slang term for male masturbation

Little Timmy's mom was pissed when she caught him Jackin' the Beanstalk

Jackin' the Beanstalk by Cheezee_mann16 November 10, 2017

jackin' the beanstalk 

One of many euphemisms for "masturbation" (e.g. slappin' the salami, jack off, beat off, buffing the bishop, glean the obscene bean, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, waxing the wonker, greasing the guppy, shooting putty at the moon, and Rosie Palmer and her Five Sisters doing the Four Knuckle Shuffle.

Frank will be a little bit late. He's still back at his house jackin' the beanstalk.

jackin' the beanstalk by Frank Klaune January 24, 2005

Jacking the beanstock 

Beatin your meat

I wanted to masturbate so I started jacking the beanstock.

Jacking the beanstock by gmhcubix August 25, 2016

Jackin' the Beanstalk 

When one inserts both testicles into a woman's vagina whilst vigorously jackin' off on her abdomen, hence the name.

Just like Jack and HIS beanstalk, last night I carefully planted my two seeds and was Jackin' the beanstalk all over Mary.

Jackin' the Beanstalk by Very Wise Man February 27, 2011

jackin the beanstalk 

pretty self explanatory. An act of jerkin it, or tuggin the bugger. Otherwise known as masturbation.

Jon: "Yo, did you do your english assignment last night?"

Me: Nah man, I was preocupied jackin the beanstalk.

Jon: You been jackin the beanstalk AGAIN?!

Me: 3 times a day bro.

jackin the beanstalk by J Benj November 5, 2007

jackin' the beanstalk 

Euphemism for masturbation. Combines a verbal allusion (jacking off) with a classic literary allusion (Jack and the Beanstalk).

Variant: "jacking the beanstalk" This variant makes use of the full, proper gerund suffix of ing - making it the preferred usage form in public and at formal gatherings, including at work, holiday and family celebrations, and when talking with grandparents, priests, co-workers, neighbors, and medical professionals such as doctors and nurses.

Ex: I don't know why Eriq doesn't lock his door; this is the 10th time I've walked in on him while he was hunched over the computer jackin' the beanstalk.

Ex. She's out of town, so I've taken matters into my own hands and been jackin' the beanstalk like a shedevil in heat.

jackin' the beanstalk by JNinWeHo November 6, 2022