hairyness
hairyness by HEEHOO BANAN July 24, 2020
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
Captain Jack Harkness
A character in the popular BBC series of Doctor Who and the spin off Torchwood. Played by John Barrowman, MBE. Captain Jack first appeared in the episode " The Empty Child" . Unfortunately Jack dies in his travels with the Doctor but is reserected by Rose when she absorbs the time vortex , it is later discovered that he is immortal. In the Future Jack is knowen as the face of Boe. Jack is the first non-heterosexual character in Doctor Who. A flirt Jack has often been referred to as a "walking innuendo".
Jack: Captain Jack Harkness. And who are you?
Martha: Martha Jones.
Jack: Nice to meet you Martha Jones.
The Doctor: Oh don't start!
Jack: I was only saying hello.
Martha: I don't mind.
Jack: Doctor.
The Doctor: Captain.
Jack: Good to see you.
The Doctor: And you. Same as ever. Although. Have you had work done?
Jack: You can talk.
Martha: Martha Jones.
Jack: Nice to meet you Martha Jones.
The Doctor: Oh don't start!
Jack: I was only saying hello.
Martha: I don't mind.
Jack: Doctor.
The Doctor: Captain.
Jack: Good to see you.
The Doctor: And you. Same as ever. Although. Have you had work done?
Jack: You can talk.
Captain Jack Harkness by TheNerp December 20, 2014
Related Words
Mohs Scale of Internet Hardness
Based off of Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness, this scale is a measurement of how dark one's World Wide Web content can get without being mentally perturbed. It is typically described as a 1-to-10 scale with a single example from each level.
1. Google - What the fuck are you, Amish?
2. Youtube - Yawn.
3. Youporn - You've experienced a taste of the dark side of the Internet, but there's still a long ways to fall.
4. /b/ - The level where most Internet Veterans find themselves comfortable. Yeah, something funny here, something disgusting there, but you've seen it all before.
5. Goatse - You're a grizzled vet. As for the previous tiers, you might've been disgusted...when you were ten.
6. 2girls1cup - As the masses comment about how terrible this is, you simply scratch your head, and wonder what the big deal is.
7. Adultfanfiction.net - I'm starting to worry about you, man. I mean, you didn't flinch at all at the three paragraph description of how the once-transparent lube became chocolate as Adam and Chris simultaneously forced their penises down Jake's virgin asshole? You're either really brave, or really crazy.
8. Beastality - Just...stay away from me. Please.
9. Pain Olympics - Alternatively known as the John McCain tier, for not even years as a POW may prepare you for this level.
10. 3guys1hammer - Get a gun, rest the barrel in your oral cavity, and pull the trigger. You should survive the shot, for no mortal could survive this level.
1. Google - What the fuck are you, Amish?
2. Youtube - Yawn.
3. Youporn - You've experienced a taste of the dark side of the Internet, but there's still a long ways to fall.
4. /b/ - The level where most Internet Veterans find themselves comfortable. Yeah, something funny here, something disgusting there, but you've seen it all before.
5. Goatse - You're a grizzled vet. As for the previous tiers, you might've been disgusted...when you were ten.
6. 2girls1cup - As the masses comment about how terrible this is, you simply scratch your head, and wonder what the big deal is.
7. Adultfanfiction.net - I'm starting to worry about you, man. I mean, you didn't flinch at all at the three paragraph description of how the once-transparent lube became chocolate as Adam and Chris simultaneously forced their penises down Jake's virgin asshole? You're either really brave, or really crazy.
8. Beastality - Just...stay away from me. Please.
9. Pain Olympics - Alternatively known as the John McCain tier, for not even years as a POW may prepare you for this level.
10. 3guys1hammer - Get a gun, rest the barrel in your oral cavity, and pull the trigger. You should survive the shot, for no mortal could survive this level.
Individuals as described by the Mohs Scale of Internet Hardness:
Your Grandparents - 1
Your Dad - 2.5
Newfag - 4
Oldfag - 5
Auschwitz Survivor - 8
Infant Rapist - 9
The Antichrist - 10
Your Grandparents - 1
Your Dad - 2.5
Newfag - 4
Oldfag - 5
Auschwitz Survivor - 8
Infant Rapist - 9
The Antichrist - 10
Mohs Scale of Internet Hardness by World Wide Web Guide January 6, 2013
harkness test
The test (which was first coined on tumblr) that monster-fuckers take when determining if they can fuck the fictional creature in questions or not. To be fuckable, the creature must:
1. Have human intelligence (or “greater”)
2. Talk or otherwise communicate with language*
3. Be of sexual maturity for its species.
If you answered yes to all of these questions, you may fuck the creature. If you answered no to any of them, you probably don’t wanna fuck it out of the possibility of beastiality or pedophilia.
*Body language is a dangerous road. Err on the side of caution.
1. Have human intelligence (or “greater”)
2. Talk or otherwise communicate with language*
3. Be of sexual maturity for its species.
If you answered yes to all of these questions, you may fuck the creature. If you answered no to any of them, you probably don’t wanna fuck it out of the possibility of beastiality or pedophilia.
*Body language is a dangerous road. Err on the side of caution.
Tumblr user: man i wanna fuck the Loch Ness monster so bad.
Reasonable person: woah man be careful. it doesn’t pass the harkness test.
Reasonable person: woah man be careful. it doesn’t pass the harkness test.
harkness test by imsorrymom July 20, 2019
Agatha Harkness
Agatha Harkness by Marvelvibes March 6, 2021
Jack Harkness
Canon Doctor Who/Torchwood Character. Omnisexual(According to John Barrowman),Iantoloving,Immortal, Ex-Time Agent from the Boeshane Peninsula in the 51st century. Companion of the 9th Doctor and temporary companion of the 10th. Actor is John Barrowman. Extremely flirty and extremely fabulous.
"Captain Jack Harkness, and you are?" Jack was trying to flirt. "Oi! Stop it!" There was a noise in the background.
Jack Harkness by Sharkcat12 January 6, 2016
Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness
The Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness displays the scratch resistance of various minerals through the ability of a harder material to scratch a softer material. It was created in 1812 by geologist Friedrich Mohs. It lists ten minerals, ranging from Talc (Softest Known Mineral) at 1 to Diamond (Hardest Known Mineral) at 10.
Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness is as follows:
1 - Talc
2 - Gypsum
3 - Calcite
4 - Fluorite
5 - Apatite
6 - Orthoclase Feldspar
7 - Quartz
8 - Topaz
9 - Corundum
10 - Diamond
1 - Talc
2 - Gypsum
3 - Calcite
4 - Fluorite
5 - Apatite
6 - Orthoclase Feldspar
7 - Quartz
8 - Topaz
9 - Corundum
10 - Diamond
Mohs Scale of Mineral Hardness by Some you'll never meet January 5, 2013
More from Urban Dictionary
square grouper
Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
Bunhead
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
trucker's tan
A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
kidulting
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
Boffin
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Pee Calculus
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026