Fat Jesus

Used to describe any overweight man with mid-length brown hair and a beard, giving the impression of what Jesus would be like if McDonalds and DVDs existed in 4th century Judea.

Popularised by the movie 'The Hangover'

1. Quote from The Hangover: "Let's go handsome, come on. Not you, Fat Jesus!"

2. Eric: "Hey, look at that rotund beardy guy over there"

Ralph: "Yeh, he's a total Fat Jesus"

3. Jack Black is sometimes a Fat Jesus

by desperate_d January 9, 2010

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Fat Jesus

The guy who always gets stuck with the fat chick in a group. A messiah for overweight women.

Looks like Fat Jesus got himself a hippo this time.

by @shot_of_cabo November 14, 2019

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too fat for jesus to love

Used to point out to someone that they are being a hater to the extent that they look like an asshole.

Jen: "That Brittany is such a skank. Did you see the size of the sluttoo back there? I guess she needs all the advertising she can get."

Steph: "Jen, you are too fat for jesus to love."

by Peter Bilt July 22, 2008

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Fat ginger jesus cannibal kallum

When describing a man who is fat, ginger and called kallum who is also most likely to eat a person.

"I hate fat ginger jesus cannibal kallum." with aggression

by Joul_Loves October 5, 2023

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Jesus Lumps-of-Fat-Fucking Christ

(exclamation): An alternative form of the phrase "Jesus Titty-Fucking Christ," often used in response to intense anger, surprise, or joy by those who are more scientifically-oriented. Also used by those who have made the observation that tits are no more than blobs of fat on a woman's chest, and there's really no reason why men should be attracted to them.

"Jesus Lumps-of-Fat-Fucking Christ Batman!" Robin exclaimed in exalting joy. "I believe the phrase is 'Jesus Titty-Fucking Christ,' and there's no reason for you to be yelling random expletives in the batcave--you remember what I said about using the Lord's name in vain" Batman wryly replied, a small smirk slowly sliding up his weathered cheeks. "Oh please, Batman," Robin replied, "that's so vulgar of you--we both know that 'titty' is such a silly word. And besides, what purpose is there in having sex with two lumps of fat? Shouldn't we just be honest about it? It's absurd." Robin stated very matter-of-factly. "Alright," Batman replied, "just don't come crying to me with your tightpants pulled clear up your ass when you go asking some girl if you can touch her lumps of fat."

by Jesus Tits December 12, 2008

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