entologist
entologist by uttam maharjan June 19, 2010
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Café Ecologist
Generally, a government employee or environmental consultant who has no practical field skills or an understanding of ecology.
Unable to navigate in the bush without the aid of a touch screen device. Turn up into the field dressed in completely new clothes, almost always in khaki and predominately featuring an outdoors store latest season catalogue. Various digital accoutrements hang off their belt to help with managing the wilderness. Prone to printing off a small woodlands worth of paperwork with every page colour coded, labelled and compartmentalised in corresponding coloured manilla folders. Cannot change a tyre.
Spend the majority of their time in the office obsessing of minor inconsequential details which will be overlooked by the client. Readily plot survey points on a map with scant regard for topography, vegetation density or difficulty of access for which they will then send out contractors to complete the actual work. Dislike meetings but will tolerate them for the tiny catered sandwiches during mid-morning tea. Drink soy lattes.
Have the fitness of a wounded gazelle. Consider light wind a significant hazard and will accordingly cancel the days work. Accustomed to hefty meal allowances of which most will be spent on sourdough and chia seeds. Don’t like spiders or things getting in their hair. Find fieldwork emotionally and physically traumatising despite their Instagram hashtags indicating otherwise.
Readily identify as an ‘ecologist’ in their email signature.
Unable to navigate in the bush without the aid of a touch screen device. Turn up into the field dressed in completely new clothes, almost always in khaki and predominately featuring an outdoors store latest season catalogue. Various digital accoutrements hang off their belt to help with managing the wilderness. Prone to printing off a small woodlands worth of paperwork with every page colour coded, labelled and compartmentalised in corresponding coloured manilla folders. Cannot change a tyre.
Spend the majority of their time in the office obsessing of minor inconsequential details which will be overlooked by the client. Readily plot survey points on a map with scant regard for topography, vegetation density or difficulty of access for which they will then send out contractors to complete the actual work. Dislike meetings but will tolerate them for the tiny catered sandwiches during mid-morning tea. Drink soy lattes.
Have the fitness of a wounded gazelle. Consider light wind a significant hazard and will accordingly cancel the days work. Accustomed to hefty meal allowances of which most will be spent on sourdough and chia seeds. Don’t like spiders or things getting in their hair. Find fieldwork emotionally and physically traumatising despite their Instagram hashtags indicating otherwise.
Readily identify as an ‘ecologist’ in their email signature.
Standing at the precipice of a volcano looking down into a cauldron of boiling, angry lava.
Ecologist 1: Who put the site down there?
Ecologist 2: A fucking café ecologist.
Ecologist 1: Who put the site down there?
Ecologist 2: A fucking café ecologist.
Café Ecologist by The Angry Biologist October 16, 2019
Related Words
ecologist
"You don't look like one of those pasty scientists that spends all day in the lab and never has any fun."
"That's because I'm an ECOLOGIST."
"That's because I'm an ECOLOGIST."
ecologist by streamlover October 3, 2013
entomologist
a zoologist who studies insects;the scientific study of insects
also, entomology - the act of studying insects
also, entomology - the act of studying insects
entomologist by SydneyS June 24, 2006
Eurologist
a doctor specializing in the care and treatment of European pricks. The majority of Eurology' patients are typically French.
The mere sight of Francois - or whatever the fuck his name is - pisses me off. I think he needs a Eurologist.
Eurologist by cyclopath September 22, 2010
Ethologist
A branch of knowledge dealing with human ethos and with its formation and evolution
the scientific and objective study of animal behavior especially under natural conditions
one who studies the habits of his less cerebral peers
the scientific and objective study of animal behavior especially under natural conditions
one who studies the habits of his less cerebral peers
one who sips espressos with a large book on the table and remarks on the curiosity of the urban distinctions in that particular locale that looks like an Ethologist over there ignore him
a stuck up middle class undergraduate student who's aim is to dissect the bourgeousie lingual dialects at his school
any of a variety of Atheist supremacists Ethologist Atheists
a stuck up middle class undergraduate student who's aim is to dissect the bourgeousie lingual dialects at his school
any of a variety of Atheist supremacists Ethologist Atheists
Ethologist by greekmangeek February 12, 2010
emologist
someone who studies emo's and their ways like sandra sands who wrote an article in the guardian which was completely slated in kerrang magasine (september 06)
emologist by The-Emologist October 15, 2006