Egologist 

A gossip magazine editor/reporter who studies(stalks) the lives of celebrities and their daily routines to find dirt about them.

Also counselor for celebrities and

Guy 1: So Michelle what do you do for living?

Girl 1: I'm a magazine editor for celebExpose

Girl 2: You mean you're a egologist?

Everyone: laughs

Egologist by K.Akiano July 23, 2010

Café Ecologist 

Generally, a government employee or environmental consultant who has no practical field skills or an understanding of ecology.

Unable to navigate in the bush without the aid of a touch screen device. Turn up into the field dressed in completely new clothes, almost always in khaki and predominately featuring an outdoors store latest season catalogue. Various digital accoutrements hang off their belt to help with managing the wilderness. Prone to printing off a small woodlands worth of paperwork with every page colour coded, labelled and compartmentalised in corresponding coloured manilla folders. Cannot change a tyre.

Spend the majority of their time in the office obsessing of minor inconsequential details which will be overlooked by the client. Readily plot survey points on a map with scant regard for topography, vegetation density or difficulty of access for which they will then send out contractors to complete the actual work. Dislike meetings but will tolerate them for the tiny catered sandwiches during mid-morning tea. Drink soy lattes.

Have the fitness of a wounded gazelle. Consider light wind a significant hazard and will accordingly cancel the days work. Accustomed to hefty meal allowances of which most will be spent on sourdough and chia seeds. Don’t like spiders or things getting in their hair. Find fieldwork emotionally and physically traumatising despite their Instagram hashtags indicating otherwise.

Readily identify as an ‘ecologist’ in their email signature.

Standing at the precipice of a volcano looking down into a cauldron of boiling, angry lava.
Ecologist 1: Who put the site down there?
Ecologist 2: A fucking café ecologist.

Café Ecologist by The Angry Biologist October 16, 2019

urban geologist

A crack smoker; One who smokes rocks. Is often found in an inner city environment.

Urban geologists mugged me for crack money behind the liquor store.

urban geologist by Stan Smith July 19, 2005

Geologist 

Geologists are 'scientists' with an unnatural obsession with geology (rocks). Often too intelligent to do monotonous sciences like biology, chemistry, or physics, geologists devote their time to mud-worrying, volcano poking, fault finding, bouldering, dust-collecting, and high-risk colouring. One of the main difficulties in communicating with geologists is their belief that a million years is a short amount of time and their heads are harder than rocks. Consequently, such abstract concepts as "Tuesday Morning" and Lunchtime are completely beyond their comprehension.

Geologists in the movies are nothing like the real thing. For example, in a volcanic eruption, or major earthquake, no geologist is going to give a rat's ass about rescuing a dog even if it does belong to the romantic interest's children. He or she will be far more concerned about the mineralogy of the ash falling from the sky, or the viscosity of the lava flow and its movement across the substrate (which may or may not include a village).

There is a considerable, and still growing body of scientific literature that suggests that geologists are in fact the world's first alcohol-based life form.

The geologists were supplied with alchohol (a common strategy to loosen up the cast in reality TV), but the camera crew was surprised to notice that even after drinking gallons of the liquid, the geologists did not change their behavior, and continued talking in an obscure jargonized language about 'bombs', 'breccia,' and 'lahars,' none of which made for good reality TV.

Geologist by AgeTurnipseed October 6, 2009

geologist 

Highly educated individuals who eat rocks.

Geologist: Tastes like asbestos.

geologist by Laelaps February 1, 2020

financial geologist 

aka gold digger, it refers to a woman (or man) who "digs for riches" by entering into romantic relationships with ballers, doctors, and lawyers. Such an individual is more interested in your bank account, bling, status, or cocaine than you.

Girls cum to Harvard to learn how to become financial geologists.

financial geologist by Muxgasm into your Anoose May 3, 2011

ecologist 

a cool person who does science, drinks beer, loves the outdoors, and is invariably hot and sexy

"You don't look like one of those pasty scientists that spends all day in the lab and never has any fun."
"That's because I'm an ECOLOGIST."

ecologist by streamlover October 3, 2013