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Vagina Distortion Field
Like the notorious reality distortion field (RDF) of Steve Jobs, a Vagina Distortion Field (VDF) affects perception, which thereby alters behavior. When someone is affected by a woman's VDF, every aspect of her being seemingly improves in that person's view. A woman's VDF typically only influences those who have not yet had access to said vagina. Being warped by a VDF is different than being pussy whipped. With the latter, the whipped individual behaves abnormally to maintain access to the pussy, but perception of the vagina owner is not altered. The VDF often has the greatest affect on the owner of the vagina, making her vastly overestimate her worth, influence, and potential.
Spock: "Captain, you are once again risking the lives of the entire crew in the pursuit of some green slag."
Kirk: "Mr. Spock, your libido-less Vulcan logic fails to grasp the enormity of the daily Pon Farr that starship command subjects on a man."
Spock: "Mr. Sulu and Mr. Chekov, move the Enterprise as far as is necessary and raise whatever shield is needed to protect the captain's mind from the insidious Vagina Distortion Field that is destroying his judgement."
Kirk: "Spawwwwwwwwwk!!!"
<cue Kirk fight music>
Kirk: "Mr. Spock, your libido-less Vulcan logic fails to grasp the enormity of the daily Pon Farr that starship command subjects on a man."
Spock: "Mr. Sulu and Mr. Chekov, move the Enterprise as far as is necessary and raise whatever shield is needed to protect the captain's mind from the insidious Vagina Distortion Field that is destroying his judgement."
Kirk: "Spawwwwwwwwwk!!!"
<cue Kirk fight music>
Vagina Distortion Field by Bachelor boB January 17, 2012
Related Words
distrot • Distrottled • distro • Distortion • distorted • Distortedmiku • distortionist • distrature • distrohopper • distrosimping
distortionist
At one time, before his traitorous cognitive decline, the Hitman in Chief was a most prolific and talented distortionist.
distortionist by Dr Bunnygirl September 27, 2019
distrohopper
A distrohopper is someone that keeps switching from one linux distribution to another, not with the intention to just test a certain Linux distribution, but with the illusion to find the perfect Linux distribution that suits all his/her needs and to install that as his/her main Operating System. Ofcours that distro does not exist.
excuses for the distrohopper: not the latest version of a certain application, a certain feature is not available in his current distro but it is available in distro X, he/she suddenly hates the theme of his current distro and distro X has this nice iconset
distrohopper by deNiros April 27, 2008
Perspectorial distortion
When a girl looks good from a distance but as the girl gets closer you realize that your previous notion was false. (Also know as P.D.)
When you see that girl from a distance and is like damn shes hot, but when she gets close you notice 5 warts on her face and an abnormally lopsided set of breast. You say "damn that was some major P.D.(Perspectorial distortion )".
Perspectorial distortion by Goldenshot1000 November 8, 2015
Social Distortion
One of the few surviving punk bands out of OC in California. Came out in 1978 with Mike Ness, Casey Royer, Rikk and Frank Agnew. Through many changes in the lineup SD pushed the spirit of true punk through rough times.
Mainly sing about problems of bad luck, run down, drug abused life, seeing as thats how it was for Ness. Best Songs were mommys little monster, Ball and chain, story of my life, Dont drag me down and few others. They have refused to change their style of music, thus making them one of the best punk bands ever.
The line up now is Ness, Charlie Quintana, Jonny "2 Bags" Wickersham, and Matt Freeman of Rancid.
RIP Dennis Danell.
Mainly sing about problems of bad luck, run down, drug abused life, seeing as thats how it was for Ness. Best Songs were mommys little monster, Ball and chain, story of my life, Dont drag me down and few others. They have refused to change their style of music, thus making them one of the best punk bands ever.
The line up now is Ness, Charlie Quintana, Jonny "2 Bags" Wickersham, and Matt Freeman of Rancid.
RIP Dennis Danell.
Social Distortion by The Real Wolf December 28, 2005
wall of distortion
The entirety of distorted facts and figures involving the “need for a border wall” coupled with the egregious manipulative use of a Federal shutdown presented by the Racist in Chief during the first formal televised speech of his administration.
The wall of distortion is that any of this is a national crisis and it’s sole purpose is to detract from his long-term and undeniable collusion with Vladimir Putin.
wall of distortion by Dr Bunnygirl January 8, 2019
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