by Arkbg1 February 6, 2025
Get the borderlove mug.When somebody consistently and repeatedly has suicidal thoughts, but hasn't seriously considered it and planned out a comprehensive course of action. Like almost all medical problems, early treatment is extremely important.
borderline-suicidal Person: I lost my job and my wife is considering divorce.... maybe I should just put one right in my head...
(Next day) Gotta drive to the unemployment office...maybe I should just lock the door and drive into a lake...
Similar thoughts repeat frequently
Suicidal person: My family was murdered and I'm being framed for it....I'll go get my gun and end it right here. I'd better do it over the bridge so there's no mess. Just in case my life insurance pays out, I'll write a will to have it all donated to charity...
(Next day) Gotta drive to the unemployment office...maybe I should just lock the door and drive into a lake...
Similar thoughts repeat frequently
Suicidal person: My family was murdered and I'm being framed for it....I'll go get my gun and end it right here. I'd better do it over the bridge so there's no mess. Just in case my life insurance pays out, I'll write a will to have it all donated to charity...
by Jean PKAM November 9, 2013
Get the borderline-suicidal mug.Generally someone who *happens* to pass by your house when they get the urge to "see" you. This person is slightly deranged and/or deluded & have created a fantasy life in their heads with you, the object of desire as their main focus. They believe you are their soul mate. Borderline stalking behaviour includes frequent online stalking.
Borderline stalkers are surprisingly very apt at hiding their rampant obsessions when they fear getting caught by others. They will go to all kinds of lengths to hide their disproportionate feelings when necessary which can even lead to them being cruel.
A borderline stalker is typically a very lonely person with some psychological issues. This type of stalker almost always has a crushing fear of true intimacy; they deliberately seek to "love from a distance". They unconciously pick partners that are unsuitable for them or already unavailable for *romantic pickings*. They may not even have a genuine desire for a real relationship with you - it might be a sexual obsession for instance.Many potential stalkers suffer from some kind of personality disorder such as Schizoid Personality Disorder.
many Borderline Stalkers are driven by fear of abandonment. They refuse to deal with the external reality of rejection by replacing it with a strong inner fantasy life of maladaptive daydreaming and inner dialogues = a 'Fantasy Prone Personality'. They are painfully indecisive about taking action in his/her life. Their worst fear is rejection.
Borderline stalkers are surprisingly very apt at hiding their rampant obsessions when they fear getting caught by others. They will go to all kinds of lengths to hide their disproportionate feelings when necessary which can even lead to them being cruel.
A borderline stalker is typically a very lonely person with some psychological issues. This type of stalker almost always has a crushing fear of true intimacy; they deliberately seek to "love from a distance". They unconciously pick partners that are unsuitable for them or already unavailable for *romantic pickings*. They may not even have a genuine desire for a real relationship with you - it might be a sexual obsession for instance.Many potential stalkers suffer from some kind of personality disorder such as Schizoid Personality Disorder.
many Borderline Stalkers are driven by fear of abandonment. They refuse to deal with the external reality of rejection by replacing it with a strong inner fantasy life of maladaptive daydreaming and inner dialogues = a 'Fantasy Prone Personality'. They are painfully indecisive about taking action in his/her life. Their worst fear is rejection.
For Example:
A borderline stalker is akin to a secret admirer, they always seem to be in the background of your life like a wallflower.
They are skilled at making their borderline stalking behaviour seem like a coincidence.
"Harry always has lunch at the same time as me in the cafeteria... Sometimes he follows me to class too. He watches me eat and slurp my slurpy. I am sure he is sexually aroused... what a borderline stalker!"
Genuine/Garden Variety Stalker: "Alicia and I have been broken up for 4 years but she still calls and breathes down the phone. It is so freaky. She even leaves empty beer cans on my front doorstep with notes attached to them like *see what you're missing out on*"
A borderline stalker is akin to a secret admirer, they always seem to be in the background of your life like a wallflower.
They are skilled at making their borderline stalking behaviour seem like a coincidence.
"Harry always has lunch at the same time as me in the cafeteria... Sometimes he follows me to class too. He watches me eat and slurp my slurpy. I am sure he is sexually aroused... what a borderline stalker!"
Genuine/Garden Variety Stalker: "Alicia and I have been broken up for 4 years but she still calls and breathes down the phone. It is so freaky. She even leaves empty beer cans on my front doorstep with notes attached to them like *see what you're missing out on*"
by DamselInDistress September 14, 2013
Get the borderline stalking mug.A short version of the definition of BPD:
In general, people with BPD feel worthless, empty, moody, needy, depressed, and have difficulty managing their emotions. They have trouble with boundaries--both their own and respecting others. They are looking for that all-loving "other" who will provide the unconditional love they cannot give themselves.
BPs often act inconsistently, act impulsively in ways they later regret, see other as either all good or all bad, and base their beliefs on feelings instead of facts. Borderlines are people in pain.
BPs commonly manage their intense pain in two ways: they act in or act out. BPs who act in may mutilate themselves, make suicide attempts, express self-hate, or seek outpatient or inpatient therapy.
Other BPs manage their pain by trying to foist it on others. They blame loved ones for all their problems, criticize, make unfair accusations, act emotionally or physically abusive, put others in no-won situations, and use emotional blackmail to get the love they need.
A longer, clinical definition of BPD used by clinicians:
The DSM-IV diagnostic criteria for borderline personality disorder reads as follows:
A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects moods, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
1.
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
People with BPD feel isolated. Anxious. Terrified at the thought of being alone. Caring, supportive people are like friendly faces in the middle of the crowd, offering smiles, help, and warm hugs. But the moment they do something that suggests an imminent departure — or do anything that the BP interprets as a signal that they’re about to leave — the BP panics and reacts in a variety of ways, from bursting into rage to begging the person to stay.
2.
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
People with BPD look to others to provide things they find difficult to supply for themselves, such as self-esteem, approval, and a sense of identity. Most of all, they are searching for a nurturing caregiver whose never-ending love and compassion will fill the black hole of emptiness and despair inside them.
For someone with BPD, the potential loss of a relationship can be like facing the loss of an arm or leg — or even death. When their fears of abandonment seem to be confirmed, they may erupt into a rage, make accusations, sob, seek revenge, mutilate themselves, have an affair, or do any number of destructive things.
3.
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
This trait refers to borderline patients’ profound and often terrifying sense that they do not know who they are. Normally, we experience ourselves consistently through time in different settings and with different people. But this continuity of self is not experienced by the person with BPD. Instead, borderline patients are filled with contradictory images of themselves that they cannot integrate.
4.
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, shoplifting, reckless driving, binge eating). Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
People with BPD may also try to fill the emptiness and create an identity for themselves through substance abuse, bingeing and purging, indiscriminate sexual activity, shoplifting, compulsive shopping, drinking, or substance abuse
5.
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self- mutilating behavior.
About 10 percent of all people with BPD commit suicide. This does not include BPs who engage in risky behavior that results in death, such as drinking and driving. Self-mutilation is another BPD behavior that is very difficult for family members to understand. Examples include cutting, burning, breaking bones, head banging, needle poking, skin scratching, pulling out hairs, and ripping off scabs — all without suicidal intent.
6.
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days). Dysphoria is the opposite of euphoria. It’s a mixture of depression, anxiety, rage, and despair.
Affective instability (mood changed) due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days).
7.
Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Patients commonly report that they feel empty inside, that there is “nothing to me,” that they are different people depending on whom they are with." This is very associated with lack of identity.
8.
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
Borderline rage is usually intense, unpredictable, and unaffected by logical argument. It is like a torrential flash flood, a sudden earthquake, or a bolt of lightning on a sunny day. And it can disappear as quickly as it appears.
Some borderlines, however, have the opposite problem: they feel unable to express their anger at all for fear they will lose control if they express even the slightest anger.
9.
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.
Have you ever arrived home from work without remembering how you got there? You’ve traveled the route so many times that your brain had its own little adventure while your eyes and reflexes do the driving. This “out of it” feeling is a mild type of dissociation.
People who are severely dissociating, however, feel unreal, strange, numb, or detached. They may or may not remember exactly what happened while they were “gone.” The degree of dissociation can vary from the car-trip-home variety to the extreme dissociation characterized by multiple personality disorder (this is why it is now called “dissociative identity disorder”).
People with BPD may have other attributes that are not part of the DSM-IV definition, but that researchers believe are common to the disorder. Many of these may be related to sexual or physical abuse if the BP has experienced abuse earlier in life.
Pervasive Shame: Toxic shame is experienced as the all-pervasive sense that a person is flawed and defective as a human being. It is no longer an emotion that signals limits; it is a state of being, a core identity. Toxic shame gives you a sense of worthlessness, the feeling of being isolated, empty, and alone in a complete sense.
Substance abuse: BPD and substance abuse disorders often go hand in hand. Another study reported that about 23 percent of borderline patients had a diagnosis of substance abuse. Borderline substance abusers are likely to abuse more than one drug (a frequent combination is drug and alcohol abuse), are more likely to be depressed, have more frequent suicide attempts and accidents, have less impulse control, and seem to have more antisocial tendencies. See http://www.actassociation.com/News/dialectical.htm.
Undefined Boundaries: People with BPD have difficulty with personal limits — both their own and those of others.
Control Issues: Borderlines may need to feel in control of other people because they feel so out of control with themselves. In addition, they may be trying to make their own world more predictable and manageable. They may choose a lifestyle where all choices are made for them, such as the military or a cult, or they may align themselves with abusive people who try to control them through fear.
Lack of Object Constancy: When a person is lonely, most of us can soothe ourselves by remembering the love that others have for us. This ability is known as object constancy. Some people with BPD, however, find it difficult to evoke an image of a loved one to soothe them when they feel upset or anxious. If that person is not physically present, they don’t exist on an emotional level.
Interpersonal Sensitivity: Some BP’s have the astute ability to identify and use social and nonverbal cues of others. They can empathize well with others and often understand and respect how others feel, and they can use these skills to “see through others.” Some BPs may continue to use these social antennae to uncover triggers and vulnerabilities.
Situational Competence: Some people with BPD are competent and in control in some situations. For example, many perform very well at work and are high achievers. Many are very intelligent, creative, and artistic. This can be very confusing for family members who don’t understand why the person can act so assuredly in one situation and fall apart in another.
In general, people with BPD feel worthless, empty, moody, needy, depressed, and have difficulty managing their emotions. They have trouble with boundaries--both their own and respecting others. They are looking for that all-loving "other" who will provide the unconditional love they cannot give themselves.
BPs often act inconsistently, act impulsively in ways they later regret, see other as either all good or all bad, and base their beliefs on feelings instead of facts. Borderlines are people in pain.
BPs commonly manage their intense pain in two ways: they act in or act out. BPs who act in may mutilate themselves, make suicide attempts, express self-hate, or seek outpatient or inpatient therapy.
Other BPs manage their pain by trying to foist it on others. They blame loved ones for all their problems, criticize, make unfair accusations, act emotionally or physically abusive, put others in no-won situations, and use emotional blackmail to get the love they need.
A longer, clinical definition of BPD used by clinicians:
The DSM-IV diagnostic criteria for borderline personality disorder reads as follows:
A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects moods, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
1.
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
People with BPD feel isolated. Anxious. Terrified at the thought of being alone. Caring, supportive people are like friendly faces in the middle of the crowd, offering smiles, help, and warm hugs. But the moment they do something that suggests an imminent departure — or do anything that the BP interprets as a signal that they’re about to leave — the BP panics and reacts in a variety of ways, from bursting into rage to begging the person to stay.
2.
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
People with BPD look to others to provide things they find difficult to supply for themselves, such as self-esteem, approval, and a sense of identity. Most of all, they are searching for a nurturing caregiver whose never-ending love and compassion will fill the black hole of emptiness and despair inside them.
For someone with BPD, the potential loss of a relationship can be like facing the loss of an arm or leg — or even death. When their fears of abandonment seem to be confirmed, they may erupt into a rage, make accusations, sob, seek revenge, mutilate themselves, have an affair, or do any number of destructive things.
3.
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
This trait refers to borderline patients’ profound and often terrifying sense that they do not know who they are. Normally, we experience ourselves consistently through time in different settings and with different people. But this continuity of self is not experienced by the person with BPD. Instead, borderline patients are filled with contradictory images of themselves that they cannot integrate.
4.
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, shoplifting, reckless driving, binge eating). Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).
People with BPD may also try to fill the emptiness and create an identity for themselves through substance abuse, bingeing and purging, indiscriminate sexual activity, shoplifting, compulsive shopping, drinking, or substance abuse
5.
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self- mutilating behavior.
About 10 percent of all people with BPD commit suicide. This does not include BPs who engage in risky behavior that results in death, such as drinking and driving. Self-mutilation is another BPD behavior that is very difficult for family members to understand. Examples include cutting, burning, breaking bones, head banging, needle poking, skin scratching, pulling out hairs, and ripping off scabs — all without suicidal intent.
6.
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days). Dysphoria is the opposite of euphoria. It’s a mixture of depression, anxiety, rage, and despair.
Affective instability (mood changed) due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days).
7.
Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Patients commonly report that they feel empty inside, that there is “nothing to me,” that they are different people depending on whom they are with." This is very associated with lack of identity.
8.
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
Borderline rage is usually intense, unpredictable, and unaffected by logical argument. It is like a torrential flash flood, a sudden earthquake, or a bolt of lightning on a sunny day. And it can disappear as quickly as it appears.
Some borderlines, however, have the opposite problem: they feel unable to express their anger at all for fear they will lose control if they express even the slightest anger.
9.
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.
Have you ever arrived home from work without remembering how you got there? You’ve traveled the route so many times that your brain had its own little adventure while your eyes and reflexes do the driving. This “out of it” feeling is a mild type of dissociation.
People who are severely dissociating, however, feel unreal, strange, numb, or detached. They may or may not remember exactly what happened while they were “gone.” The degree of dissociation can vary from the car-trip-home variety to the extreme dissociation characterized by multiple personality disorder (this is why it is now called “dissociative identity disorder”).
People with BPD may have other attributes that are not part of the DSM-IV definition, but that researchers believe are common to the disorder. Many of these may be related to sexual or physical abuse if the BP has experienced abuse earlier in life.
Pervasive Shame: Toxic shame is experienced as the all-pervasive sense that a person is flawed and defective as a human being. It is no longer an emotion that signals limits; it is a state of being, a core identity. Toxic shame gives you a sense of worthlessness, the feeling of being isolated, empty, and alone in a complete sense.
Substance abuse: BPD and substance abuse disorders often go hand in hand. Another study reported that about 23 percent of borderline patients had a diagnosis of substance abuse. Borderline substance abusers are likely to abuse more than one drug (a frequent combination is drug and alcohol abuse), are more likely to be depressed, have more frequent suicide attempts and accidents, have less impulse control, and seem to have more antisocial tendencies. See http://www.actassociation.com/News/dialectical.htm.
Undefined Boundaries: People with BPD have difficulty with personal limits — both their own and those of others.
Control Issues: Borderlines may need to feel in control of other people because they feel so out of control with themselves. In addition, they may be trying to make their own world more predictable and manageable. They may choose a lifestyle where all choices are made for them, such as the military or a cult, or they may align themselves with abusive people who try to control them through fear.
Lack of Object Constancy: When a person is lonely, most of us can soothe ourselves by remembering the love that others have for us. This ability is known as object constancy. Some people with BPD, however, find it difficult to evoke an image of a loved one to soothe them when they feel upset or anxious. If that person is not physically present, they don’t exist on an emotional level.
Interpersonal Sensitivity: Some BP’s have the astute ability to identify and use social and nonverbal cues of others. They can empathize well with others and often understand and respect how others feel, and they can use these skills to “see through others.” Some BPs may continue to use these social antennae to uncover triggers and vulnerabilities.
Situational Competence: Some people with BPD are competent and in control in some situations. For example, many perform very well at work and are high achievers. Many are very intelligent, creative, and artistic. This can be very confusing for family members who don’t understand why the person can act so assuredly in one situation and fall apart in another.
What is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)?
A borderline writes:
"Being a borderline feels like eternal hell. Nothing less. Pain, anger, confusion, hurt, never knowing how I'm gonna feel from one minute to the next. Hurting because I hurt those who I love. Feeling misunderstood. Analyzing everything. Nothing gives me pleasure. Once in a great while I will get "too happy" and then anxious because of that. Then I self-medicate with alcohol. Then I physically hurt myself. Then I feel guilty because of that. Shame. Wanting to die but not being able to kill myself because I'd feel too much guilt for those I'd hurt, and then feeling angry about that so I cut myself or O.D. to make all the feelings go away. Stress!"
A borderline writes:
"Being a borderline feels like eternal hell. Nothing less. Pain, anger, confusion, hurt, never knowing how I'm gonna feel from one minute to the next. Hurting because I hurt those who I love. Feeling misunderstood. Analyzing everything. Nothing gives me pleasure. Once in a great while I will get "too happy" and then anxious because of that. Then I self-medicate with alcohol. Then I physically hurt myself. Then I feel guilty because of that. Shame. Wanting to die but not being able to kill myself because I'd feel too much guilt for those I'd hurt, and then feeling angry about that so I cut myself or O.D. to make all the feelings go away. Stress!"
by paranoid5150 January 1, 2009
Get the Borderline Personality Disorder mug.Personality disorder in which an individual shows a generalized pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and observable emotions, and significant impulsiveness.
Relationships with others are intense but stormy and unstable with marked shifts of feelings and difficulties in maintaining intimate, close connections. The person may manipulate others and often has difficulty with trusting others. There is also emotional instability with marked and frequent shifts to an empty lonely depression or to irritability and anxiety. There may be unpredictable and impulsive behavior which might include excessive spending, promiscuity, gambling, drug or alcohol abuse, shoplifting, overeating or physically self-damaging actions such as suicide gestures. The person may show inappropriate and intense anger or rage with temper tantrums, constant brooding and resentment, feelings of deprivation, and a loss of control or fear of loss of control over angry feelings. There are also identity disturbances with confusion and uncertainty about self-identity, sexuality, life goals and values, career choices, friendships. There is a deep-seated feeling that one is flawed, defective, damaged or bad in some way, with a tendency to go to extremes in thinking, feeling or behavior. Under extreme stress or in severe cases there can be brief psychotic episodes with loss of contact with reality or bizarre behavior or symptoms. Even in less severe instances, there is often significant disruption of relationships and work performance. The depression which accompanies this disorder can cause much suffering and can lead to serious suicide attempts.
by Juliet February 22, 2005
Get the borderline mug.A person with indications of traits associated with gingeritis (e.g., redish hair, freckles, white skin). Still, the traits are not accentuated enough to allow a certain classification.
by GorillaONE March 23, 2011
Get the borderline ginger mug.Staying up so late over winter/spring/summer break that you are sleeping through almost the whole day.
Todd: Dude, I've been texting you all day, why didn't you answer?
Mike: Sorry bro I've been so borderline nocturnal lately that I couldn't check my phone until now.
Mike: Sorry bro I've been so borderline nocturnal lately that I couldn't check my phone until now.
by blerghhhhhhh January 7, 2013
Get the borderline nocturnal mug.