by Uber caMeL! September 14, 2003
Get the autofellator mug.A self-written biographical sketch, such as one submitted in support of an award application, in which the writer plays up and exaggerates their own accomplishments, giving themselves a symbolic blow job.
"I got nominated for employee of the year, but now they're making me write an autofellatiography. I'm gagging."
by Fishbert December 16, 2008
Get the autofellatiography mug.Related Words
The artist formally known, as the artist formally known as the artist, leant over and sucked himself until he came.
by spylad August 11, 2003
Get the autofellatio mug.The act of a man in puberty or older fellating, or sucking, his own penis as a form of masturbation. Another term for this is selfsuck. It feels amazing and tastes really good, trust me. Unfortunately only a small percentage of the population has the combined dick size and flexibility required to be able to do this.
I am in the low percentage who can do autofellatio on will. First, take off all your clothes, including pants and shirt and lay onto a soft surface like a bed. Then roll your legs up and behind your head. Keep at least part of your back or shoulders on the bed. Start stroking your penis and stretch your head as close as possible. Keep stroking until it is hard, and touch it with your mouth. Seal the head of the cock in your lips, and lick the skin around it with your tongue. Push the cock further in your mouth while licking it and occasionally sucking it. Do it slowly at first but gradually go faster over time. When you are about to cum, go as quickly as possible and let yourself nut in your mouth. Feel and taste the warm semen being pumped on your tongue, and swallow every drop of it. A great way to relieve your sexual stress with no required cleanup that allows you to perceive both perspectives at the same time. That is autofellatio.
by WhoDatFreshBoi May 7, 2019
Get the Autofellatio mug.Autofellatio is a form of male masturbation where the male bends in half to suck his own penis. There is a few different positions. The "C" position in which he sits in a chair and with his hands under his legs, pulls himself up to suck himself. The "Backwards C" position is where lying on his back, he bends backwards and "walks" down the wall behind him to reach himself. The hardest of all is the "X" position. The autofellatior locks his feet behind his head to reach his penis. The "fact" that less than 1 percent of men can accomplish this is WRONG. The reason it is so low a number is that most men who were asked if they can said no, even though they can, out of embarrasment. Recent studies show that it has gone from 1 percent to 3 or 5 percent in the last decade. More men or comfortable with themselves to admit it. You do not have to be well-endowed, (have a big penis) to enjoy autofellatio, although it does help. It all depends on how flexible you are.
by Skaterpunk6207 August 5, 2007
Get the Autofellatio mug.As the population grows over it's potential, the evolutionary process begins to take place. Humans will adapt to be able to perform autofellatio in order to reduce sexual desire. This will cause a dramatic drop in rates of sexual intercourse, allowing the human population to return to a more reasonable size that the one we cannot currently maintain.
The world is getting to large. Evolution must take place, as it did in other organisms. The way humans will adapt to influence a decline in a sizable population is the Autofellatioic Evolution of Humans.
by Ace. October 17, 2012
Get the Autofellatioic Evolution of Humans mug.