analcyst

A person, usually a political figure or newsreader who thinks that their opinions and ideology is correct even though it is based on Post-Truth and AltFacts, the word is a derivative of Analyst

Nigel was so pleased when Faux News hired him as an Analcyst as it gave him a platform to argue his alternative facts, and post-truth.

by DominicCummings January 24, 2017

Analyst

Somebody who doesn't know anything

Analysts at the rating agency gave Lehman Brothers an AAA rating.

by hlm666 December 23, 2011

sports analyst

Anybody who gets paid a hefty sum to sit on their ass in front of a camera and give their "analyzation" of whatever sport under scrutiny. The analyzation usually consists of their own damn opinion. Most sports analysts in todays age consists of an old player of a particular sport because they either 1) need the money, 2) miss seeing their damn face on the tv screen, or 3) miss getting hot pussy with no effort.

Every mindless fuck could be a sports analyst in today's world.

by atmag06 June 2, 2005

Application Support Analyst

This is an individual that will deal primarily with anything the client is too lazy to figure out on their own. He will attempt to find out, through testing and research (RTFM), if the clients issue is a bug. Most common cause is lazy, under trained clients that process transactions incorrectly and don’t know why they are incorrect. He will also be called on to participate in client calls that the CSM’s can’t handle on their own, QA work, training, implementation, writing knowledge base articles, writing up bugs and anything else that the rest of the company does not want to do. These individuals can be found in the break room during a 3 hr lunch; watching “Rock of Love”, playing Wii and getting a massage. If they are “working” at their desks; listen for individuals screaming “not it” when client calls come in. They are also known to be utterly useless on Fridays; commonly smelling of hops and barely. If you encounter one of these individuals make sure to not make eye contact, ask for any help or seem happy for any reason; as they have been known to completely destroy other people via IM

Client: Hi, I am having a problem with my software can you help?
Application Support Analyst: Are you a client? If so, enter a ticket and I will get to it when you are considered a high priority client.
Client: How do I do that?
Application Support Analyst: Your manager has to call and bitch more to my manager.

by Miles Mayhem May 8, 2008

Analystware

Software based primarily on an underlying technology (e.g. Cloud, SOA, REST) or “standard” (XACML, SPML, etc..) currently being hyped by industry analysts rather than on any actual real-world customer needs. The standard for the standards sake or “100% made of the new standard” would be their key messaging.

That Axiomaticals is so hot right now - they are pure Analystware.

by Patrick EID October 8, 2011

Analyst

Prounounced ANALyst

A special in all fields Anal. Anal Sex Rimming etc!!

Tom:- Did you do anything good with that bitch you bedded last night?

Paul:- HELL Yeah. I was muffing her out and she gave me such quality rimjob. Man She is an Analyst!!

by Graham Wallace April 6, 2008

nasal analyst

An individual who uses their nose as a multifunctional device. They recognise people or objects by smelling them. They also use their noses to breathe. They can even read text with their nostrils.

I saw this Nasal analyst in the carpet shop, he was sniffing the fabric guide. He actually bought a carpet with his nose!

by TurtleCracker93 January 1, 2014