amsturbation
travelling to amsterdam, hoping to get laid, but unfortunate circumstances forcing you to wank instead.
amsturbation by chicken adventurous May 9, 2006
Words you can keep
Comedic Masturbation
When you are so funny by yourself that you laugh out loud without any participation by a partner.
Progresses from a small grin to a smile to a quiet giggle and then quickly reaches the climactic event of an audible belly laugh, or LOL. Following climax, tissue is often used to dry resulting wetness occuring in the ocular region.
Progresses from a small grin to a smile to a quiet giggle and then quickly reaches the climactic event of an audible belly laugh, or LOL. Following climax, tissue is often used to dry resulting wetness occuring in the ocular region.
My humor is not always understood by others and I frequently find myself involuntarily engaging in comedic masturbation.
Comedic Masturbation by K-Rista-Raaah July 22, 2016
Bureaucratic Masturbation
noun - 1. Engaging in any activity for the sake of making one feel better about themselves, their organization, or their company without actually accomplishing anything. 2. Holding meetings to provide recommendations only to have management do what they wanted in the first place. 3. Holding special work group meetings to make the 'little people' feel ownership, when the decision has already been made by higher levels of management.
My boss has picked me to suffer through more Bureaucratic Masturbation, representing the department on a policy work group.
I spent the last 3 months researching the best candidate for the position and the Boss picked his pet employee anyway. God I hat Bureaucratic Masturbation!
I spent the last 3 months researching the best candidate for the position and the Boss picked his pet employee anyway. God I hat Bureaucratic Masturbation!
Bureaucratic Masturbation by Bill Koogler January 17, 2008
Masturbation guilt
The sense of guilt you feel post-masturbation when you realized what you have just jerked yourself off to.
Masturbation guilt by GunaDK January 19, 2012
Public Masturbation
Public Masturbation by thepseudonymousbosch February 21, 2017
Masturbation Marathon
An exceptionally long episode of masturbation fits. These episodes are usually brought on by sexual deprivation and bordom; however, and I'm not making this up, they have been used a means of fundraising for sexual related causes such as safe sex. A masturbation marathon is a strenuous event that requires disciplined training and preparation. There are several related subcatagories such as time, ejaculation distance, and most orgasms for both male and female competitors (I'm totally serious - google it).
Masturbation Marathon by Face_Bones August 29, 2013
Social Media Masturbation
"I look so awesome today" - Liking this comment with a thumbs up beneath it on Facebook or retweeting comment on Twitter is Social Media Masturbation.
Social Media Masturbation by Mistress Weber April 16, 2011
More from Urban Dictionary
Purple Patch
To describe coming into something good, coming into good luck and or good times.
Like walking over small green hills in the countryside then coming across a purple patch of flowers, thus it being unique and out of the ordinary.
Like walking over small green hills in the countryside then coming across a purple patch of flowers, thus it being unique and out of the ordinary.
I hit a real purple patch.
The other day this good thing happened unexpectedly then I was lucky with this, it was unique, I hit a real purple patch.
The other day this good thing happened unexpectedly then I was lucky with this, it was unique, I hit a real purple patch.
Purple Patch by Ralph Shitstorm October 27, 2020
Word of the Day on September 5, 2026
dirrty
1. Meaning nasty, sexy, filthy. Popularized by Christina Aguilera.
2. Used usally as a close friend in hip-hop slang.
2. Used usally as a close friend in hip-hop slang.
Coyote Ugly
1. Place
The Bar came before the movie. It is an awesome bar where the girls know how to party and make you feel okay about giving up your money, drawers, bras, and dignity.
2. Movie
A story about a Jersey girl following her dreams, aided by working at this bar in New York.
3. Situation/Person/Decision
See other definitions - waking up next to someone so ugly you'd rather chew your arm off than wake them up.
The Bar came before the movie. It is an awesome bar where the girls know how to party and make you feel okay about giving up your money, drawers, bras, and dignity.
2. Movie
A story about a Jersey girl following her dreams, aided by working at this bar in New York.
3. Situation/Person/Decision
See other definitions - waking up next to someone so ugly you'd rather chew your arm off than wake them up.
1. Yo, Coyote Ugly is my favorite bar! I got whipped, stripped, drunk, and danced on the bar all before 7 o'clock!
2. Hey did you see Coyote Ugly? It actually has a plot!
3. Ugg I woke up to Coyote Ugly this morning!
2. Hey did you see Coyote Ugly? It actually has a plot!
3. Ugg I woke up to Coyote Ugly this morning!
Coyote Ugly by jerseycountry March 8, 2009
Word of the Day on September 2, 2026
Literally 1984
Used in response for when someone promotes/advocates an event or idea that is perceived to support "too much" authority and/or government control.
Often used jokingly as a over-exaggeration in political talk.
Can also be used in response to a ban or mute in a forum site or online chat.
Often used jokingly as a over-exaggeration in political talk.
Can also be used in response to a ban or mute in a forum site or online chat.
Steve: I think that the government should regulate businesses more
Bob: Literally 1984!
--User1 has been permantly banned--
User2: You cant ban my friend like that! Literally 1984!
Bob: Literally 1984!
--User1 has been permantly banned--
User2: You cant ban my friend like that! Literally 1984!
Literally 1984 by ke1 July 7, 2021
Word of the Day on September 1, 2026
Back when I lived in upstate new york
A meaningless, unimpressive, self-serving introduction. An indicator that the story about to be shared will be pointless and dumb.
Back when I lived in upstate new york, I also had to park on the street - on two occasions, we got enough snow, mixed with just the right plowing, that my car was lifted off the ground from so much snow being jammed underneath it.
Back when I lived in upstate new york by NDcent December 14, 2010
Word of the Day on August 31, 2026