alpch

You get no bitched

Jim- hey can I hit your vape
John- no you alpch

by Thor12 April 12, 2022

Alpha Fucks Beta Bucks

A phrase to describe a woman's mating behavior where she freely engages in sexual activities with the physically attractive, charismatic, charming, suave and confident males - in other words, the Alpha males - with no strings attached, shit-tests, favors, catches and any rules, hence Alpha Fucks.

At the same time the woman denies sex to the physically unattractive and undesirable men - in other words, the Beta males - instead giving ambiguous promises that sex will be offered in return if the males treat her well, take her out to dates, buy her dinner, bring her gifts, etc, hence Beta Bucks.

For the Betas, sex is held behind many barriers such as the "three dates" rule, all-expenses paid dinners, shopping trips, favors, funny jokes, rapport building, lengthy text convos, shit tests and more... all the while as the Alphas get to have sex right away without having to do all that in advance. Hence, the term Alpha Fucks Beta Bucks.

This phrase can also alternatively be used to describe how a woman spends her young and fertile years hooking up and getting knocked up by the Alphas with absolutely no strings attached, and later as she seeks to settle down, seeks out a Beta to provide for her and her Alpha spawn.

Synonyms for Alpha Fucks Beta Bucks include:

Alpha Fame Beta Shame
Alpha Boss Beta Loss
Alpha Lay Beta Pay
Alpha Sex Beta Checks
Alpha Seed Beta Need
Alpha Fornicate Beta Masturbate

Samantha wrote on her Tinder profile "I'm looking for a gentleman to treat me right, buy me gifts and take me to dinners. No hookups unless you look like Jason Statham!" She is in Alpha Fucks Beta Bucks mode.

Josie had a kid with Jamal the pro basketball player and then married Richard from retail five years later. Alpha Fucks Beta Bucks.

by alam101 March 17, 2019

Alpha Office

The head office in a business of multiple offices, defined by leadership, charge, determination, wisdom, charm, chivalry and respect. As a status, this can not be taken, but must be earnt, usually though battle royale. This cannot be earned while the current alpha office still physically exists. The status can be bought, but the only payment method acceptable is blood.

Also has historical relevance for the business, usually being its point of origin.

Brandon: "Where's Brad today?"

Pedro: "Oh he had to go over to the Alpha office in Camden, his axe was blunt."

Brandon: "But they don't even need axes in Alpha Office, don't they just use their hands?"

Pedro: "Yes."

Brandon: "I wish I was Alpha."

by SchnittyLover69 October 24, 2011

alpha widow

A woman, usually with average sexual market value (SMV), who sleeps with a high sexual market value male , a/k/a the alpha male, who does not wish to have a long-term relationship with the woman. The woman views the alpha male as superior to most, if not all, of the other men pursuing her, and so the woman continues to lust after the alpha male she cannot have, sacrificing future long-term relationships with lower-SMV men, making her a "widow", in a sense, to the original alpha male.

Jane could never seem to get over her one true love, Rocco, even after she was married to John. Jane must be an alpha widow.

by Bolo919 December 2, 2017

Alpha Widow

A woman (typically but not necessarily post-wall) who has been abandoned by an Alpha male. No matter how great her new man is, she will perceive him as failing to meet the standard of the alpha she was previously associated with. Due to hypergamy, a woman cannot date backwards, once she gets say, a male 8, she cannot date below a male 8 and be happy with him. If she does, she is just using said man for resources (Beta Bucks) and doesn't really love him. Essentially, a damaged woman accustomed to a tier of man she can no longer attract.

Karen was alpha widowed after a one-night-stand in college, and rejected all suitors that didn't live up to Chad. She is now old, single, lonely with 3 cats.

by th0tttt_patr0l July 2, 2019

alpha bro

The leader of a pack of bros; inspires the worship of subordinate bros through being slightly more articulate and much more aggressive, and having both a higher alcohol tolerance and better luck with the bro hoes.

At a frat party:

Rachel: What's the matter with all the bros tonight? They seem subdued.

Sarah: Yeah, Vinny's not here. They're totally lost without their alpha bro.

by ameech November 5, 2009

Alpha Bitch

Someone who is bossy, rude, bitchy, and has no rivals/bullies. While they are almost always found in schools, they can also be found in similar places. An alpha bitch is usually seen as a responsible, inspiring, and helpful leader in the eyes of their superiors (whether that be their teachers, their boss, etc), but that couldn't be farther from the truth, for when their superiors aren't around, they feel like they can rule over everyone and impose restrictions on other people. I should also mention the fact that they feel the need to snitch on people whenever they get the chance, and that can be for the smallest thing, like swearing or breaking the most retarded rule ever, and then they just turn around and do the same god-damned thing, because they know nobody is going to snitch on them, because if they did, their superiors would never believe that the "responsible, helpful, leader" did something bad. An alpha bitch will also, at times, insult people, and when they do, many people around them usually start to laugh, the alpha bitch will continue to roast you like a chicken for however long they please; but god-forbid you EVER have the AUDACITY to insult them back, for if you do, they will play the victim like crazy, then they, along with their friends, will give you a beating for the ages!

Ellen: Hey, Zack, take that retarded bracelet off before I kick you in the balls!
Zack: Why?
Ellen: Why? Because, or else I'll fuck your mom!
*Everyone except for Zack erupts in laughter*
Zack: You have no reason to tell me that, you have no authority over me you stupid retard!
Ellen: Oh my god! We do not say that word! Do you have any idea what that means?
Zack: You said it like one minute ago!
Ellen: It doesn't matter!
*Ellen's friend snitches on Zack*
Kevin: Zack, you idiot! She's an alpha bitch!
Zack: So....?

Kevin: Not only are you in deep shit for saying the R-word, but she's gonna beat you to death for insulting her.

by JustAnotherSickFuckOnUrbanDic July 30, 2021