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the dog fucked me 

The opposite of Fucking the Dog. When you work your ass off and you never seem to get ahead.
Dude, The dog fucked me hardcore today, and i even stayed overtime.
the dog fucked me by Sn0tr0cket January 1, 2008

the dog fucked the ass-kisser 

It’s an old Persian saying for when someone is trying to point out that there is nothing but shame in being an ass-kisser to an ass-kisser.
A: Hijab is a culture for all our Iranian women and we should make sure everyone wears it at all times.

B: Shut up man, the dog fucked the ass-kisser.

In this example, person A was trying to support the forced hijab rule and cover it up by calling it culture.

fucked the dog 

to have screwed up or failed at a task, usually spectacularly or with disastrous results. Said failure can involve lack of effort or lack of competence and usually both. Vulgarization of "screwed the pooch."
Bridegroom: dude the whole stripper-in-a-cake thing is more fun when she's not 74 years old and narcoleptic
Best man: yeah i really fucked the dog on that one didn't i
fucked the dog by eggy mule August 19, 2010

fucked the dog 

To do nothing, procrastinate, or avoid doing a task that is undesirable
I was sick of doing school work so I took the day off and fucked the dog
fucked the dog by Omallley April 11, 2005

fucked the dog 

Complete incompetence and unable to complete a basic task.
RM: This is a shitty hockey game.

CG: Ya, the Habs haven't scored for the third game in a row!
RM: I know, they sure fucked the dog tonight.
fucked the dog by ha223kj2 April 13, 2011

I Fucked The Dog 

This phrase does not mean what it says... It is an easy and stealthy to mention to anyone that you had sex with the ugly guy/girl at the bar/club/restaurant . To people that aren't aware they may think its a joke , but your friends will!
Bro 1 : I was at the pub last night and when I got home, I fucked the dog.

Dude 1 : Wow dude thats funny but obviously you dont have sex with animals

Bro 2 : damn mate , why would u fuck her, dont u know theres much prettier women at the pub
I Fucked The Dog by yeaokbuddy December 17, 2022
More from Urban Dictionary
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026

Northstarring

Finding your way back to the truth by fixing on one verified fact and working out from there, the way you navigate by the North Star when everything around you is spinning.
Rumours were flying everywhere, so she went northstarring — one checked fact at a time.
Northstarring by Light Bearer October 22, 2026
Word of the Day on October 23, 2026
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