1. A phrase used to express that something
will or will not happen. This expression alludes to the ages-old superstition that literally knocking on
wood would ward off evil spirits.
2. To
masturbate, said of males.
(made-up
scene from GTA San
Andreas)
(at the beach)
Kent
Paul: (ogling a hot girl come out of the water) Oi Maccer, just take a look at what just breezed out of the blue. That height, that arse, those jugs, those curves! Blimey if I'd be given the chance now I'd get to chuck my junk in that, knock on wood!
Maccer: Indeed
man! Knock on wood, eh. Well alright then! *starts masturbating*
Kent Paul: No, jack-off Jimmy, not... ohh, *mumbles* fucking Northeners!
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Mark H. Proud Urban Dictionary slang author since February 2004.