can handle 

the act of shitting into another human's ass via a small connecting tube.

When he put the tube up my ass, I thought the gerbil was next. Turns out the motherfucker just wanted to can handle me. What a shitty mess!

can handle by Gaydar Love October 24, 2003

Randle No Can Handle 

Randle No Can Handle means a person can't handle the amount of weed they smoked or the amount of alcohol they consumed. The symptoms of Randle No Can Handle is when a person throws up or knocks out cold.

originated in Hawaii

Guy 1: Duuude, ty just passed out from drinking to much vodka.

Guy 2: Ahhhh randle no can handle

Randle No Can Handle by FrankieDawg August 31, 2011

you can't handle the truth

Expression first popularised by Jack Nicholson in the character of Col. Nathan R. Jessep in A Few Good Men (1992, dir. Rob Reiner), when he blows up in court in Tom Cruise's face. Handy exclamation to direct at the computer screen when somebody votes down an eminently rational definition on urbandictionary. Parodied by Sideshow Bob in an episode of The Simpsons ("Pish! I deride your truth-handling abilities!").

Kaffee: I want the truth!
Jessep (yells): You can't handle the truth!

you can't handle the truth by Fearman April 15, 2008

Don't Bring The Brullox If You Can't Handle The Rullex 

When a "self-proclaimed rapper" gets high, then pissed off and tries to rhyme the words "brawl" and "ruckus," the words must be changed into words that don't exist, thus, "Don't bring the brawl if you can't handle the ruckus" becomes "Don't bring the brullox if you can't handle the rullex."

"Don't bring the brullox if you can't handle the rullex."

Don't Bring The Brullox If You Can't Handle The Rullex by The Last Shot Caller October 5, 2007

Can't Handle It 

Being put to the test and resulting in failure.

Nick Bream can't handle it

Can't Handle It by some ese August 22, 2010

I can't handle 

phrase that typically describes a situation that encompasses one or many of the following emotions:
1. a feeling of overwhelming intensity(usually sexual)
2. a recalled memory of grandeur
3. a moment of enormous success
4. a description of beauty or repulsiveness
5. a moment of great frustration(usually sexual)

"Russell Nelson.
Oh my God.
This guy, his triangle torso.
--
I can't handle..."

I can't handle by ftdrum March 19, 2011

you can't handle me

when you're unable to manipulate something put into your possessions or unable to control someone or something into a stable range of management.

other interpretations:
you can't handle this
you can't handle it

boy: can i talk to you for a second?
girl: no.
boy: can i just...
girl: no.
boy: well, just...
girl: no.
boy: you can't handle me, anyway.

you can't handle me by youcan'thandleme December 22, 2007