Fearman's definitions

Benedict XVI

(As of 2007) current occupant of the Throne of Peter. Talks a fair amount about gays in rather shrill tones. Likes to hide behind other powerful men before coming into the limelight, as he did as the author of many of Karol Wojtyla's bulls. Really has a fabulous wardrobe. Last seen slinking around St. Peter's in a pair of ruby slippers, just like Judy. Has a birth name meaning rat-catcher, good job he got his current post so he can shed that skin and emerge from his chryalis transformed into a beautiful butterfly. Most beloved closet queen on the planet. After all, he may come from the backwoods of Deutschland, but deep down he knows, there's no place like Rome, there's no place like Rome (click click) there's no place like Rome.

Benedict XVI, I've got your number.

by Fearman August 21, 2007

open-minded

1. Ready to accept on firm evidence that one's most cherished beliefs may be hogwash, but bearing in mind that extraordinary claims demand extraordinary evidence.

2. Politically correct synonym for "gullible" used by New Age quacks who want to sell you a bill of goods.

I am open-minded about the existence of the Judeo-Christian God. If he appears in the immortal flesh in the heavens to me and a few billion other people and manifests his power openly in such a manner that it cannot possibly be a dream, illusion, hallucination or anything of the sort, I'll accept he is there. In the meantime, it is more befitting the heritage of the human intellect to ignore such figures as mythical.

Open-mindedness is a virtue, but when dealing with New Age salespeople it is important to remember that if you keep your mind too open, your brain may fall out.

by Fearman March 29, 2008

shit cubed

The epitome of evil, typically someone from the gutter who is the epitome of evil.

Stalin, Hitler, Pot Pot and a few other shining gentlemen who are shit cubed.

by Fearman August 19, 2007

make me one with everything

What the mystic said to the pizza chef.

"Make me one with everything", the mystic said to the pizza chef. Need I say more?

by Fearman April 11, 2008

Christopher Walken

Quirky and slightly mental-looking Hollywood actor. Hasn't got nearly as many good roles as he should. Look out for him in David Cronenberg's The Dead Zone, Spielberg's Catch Me if you Can or in the movie of Ian McEwan's The Comfort of Strangers.

Watch out. Here comes a Christopher Walken character.

by Fearman December 17, 2007

all-singing, all-dancing

All-singing, all-dancing: state of the art, perhaps a little conceited, best new thing. Popularised by the movie Fight Club (1999), starring Brad Pitt, David Norton, Meatloaf and Helena Bonham-Carter, directed by David Fincher and based on the novel by Chuck Palahniuk.

We are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

by Fearman May 28, 2008

four headed grass accident

Something spectacularly silly and sublimely expressive of the comical futility of human existence. Like a four headed baby conceived between a couple who couldn't even recognise one another because the grass was too tall (or they had smoked too much of it). An utter disaster.

Little Downs-Syndrome Pepita here is Marcia's little four headed grass accident.

His thirtieth birthday party was a four headed grass accident.

by Fearman February 14, 2008