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The Calendar Option
A technique of temporarily “saving face” with colleagues, bosses, customers, and auditors by changing every calendar and clock in a particular workplace in an effort to cover up a missed deadline. “The Calendar Option” is the “Nuclear Option” of work place fault misdirection. “The Calendar Option” should only be used when the monumental task of changing dozens of calendars, clocks, and watches pales in comparison to actually completing ones assigned task on time. Hacking of local computer and cellular networks is usually preferred, as these sources represent the primary ways of determining dates and times. “The Calendar Option” will buy you enough time to prepare a resume, write a cover page, and apply for other jobs in the timespan prior to your superiors realizing you’ve elegantly gamed them to death. Worried about future employment? Don’t! One who can successfully employ “The Calendar Option” is often far under-employed anyway. This fact is clearly demonstrated as the time, energy, intelligence and sheer skill required to pull off the maneuver could be accomplished by no less than an American, tier 1, Special Forces operator who is also a Ninja.
Are you late? Can’t blame a colleague? Can’t blame your computer? Can’t blame the weather? Don’t even bother! Just employ “The Calendar Option” and you won’t need to blame a thing because the calendar and clocks say “you’re not late!”
late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame
late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame
The Calendar Option by Darren Besert January 21, 2016
Related Words
Calinda • Calendar • Calendar Girl • Calina • calendarize • calendario • Calendarman • Calendar pedant • calida • Calindel
Calendar Shopping
Those times when you buy a new Calander before New Years. This is usually done a day or two after Christmas.
Person 1: Hey lets go Calendar Shopping. I need to get a new Calander before New Years.
Person 2: Aight. I'm gonna get me one of those FHM calandars.
Person 2: Aight. I'm gonna get me one of those FHM calandars.
Calendar Shopping by Dancing with Fire December 29, 2010
calendar dump
When you ring in the New Year on the toilet with one final dump, cleansing yourself from the old and welcoming the new. Starts on December 31st shortly before midnight.
calendar dump by C-Lo Brown May 4, 2017
Calina
Calina is one of the girls that you’re very lucky to meet in life. She’s all rounder who is usually kind and caring, the perfect girlfriend. She’s a girl who can be so good at things when she wants to. If you’re on her good side, then you’re in luck because she is one of the most loyal friends you’ll ever be able to find. She’s sometimes shy and you’ll have to get to know her better to know more about her inner qualities. Also she is cute af.
If you’re lucky enough to get a girl like Calina, never let her go, and treat her well because it’s very hard to find one like her!
If you’re lucky enough to get a girl like Calina, never let her go, and treat her well because it’s very hard to find one like her!
Calina by Anonymous.31 October 17, 2021
NNN Calendar
The NNN Calendar is a calendar revolving around NNN.
-Jizz January
-No Finger February
-Massive Masturbate March
-Ass Eating April
-Gay May
-Make It Jelly June
-Even More Jizz July
-Mass Ass August
-Semen Shooter September
-Orgi October
-No Nut November
-Destroy Dick December
-Jizz January
-No Finger February
-Massive Masturbate March
-Ass Eating April
-Gay May
-Make It Jelly June
-Even More Jizz July
-Mass Ass August
-Semen Shooter September
-Orgi October
-No Nut November
-Destroy Dick December
NNN Calendar by SpikeyFluffBall November 7, 2019
calendar wolf
A wolf that has been hand-raised for the sole reason of photographed for calendars. Usually, calendar wolves look much healthier than their wild cousins, and eat not from freshly killed prey, but a bowl with their name on it. Could also refer to a disingenuous person, or a poseur.
calendar wolf by dddrew January 16, 2008
Word of the Day on April 23, 2024
More from Urban Dictionary
Bunhead
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
trucker's tan
A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
kidulting
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
Boffin
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
Pee Calculus
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026