Belgua

A misspelled version of the famous Youtuber, Beluga. He usually mispells his name in his discord skits, to add comedy.

Normals: Bruh, Beluga has a new vid.
Chads: Nice, Belgua's vids are cool

Belgua by Kill•A March 15, 2022

Belgian Lives Matter 

A joke movement based off of Black Lives Matter made by the Hearts of Iron 4 youtuber isorrowproductions to help the Belgian people. They are systematically oppressed by at least one half of their country that is so out of touch with the other that they may as well be speaking a different language. (The joke is that the different parts of Belgium speak different languages, which is true) The movement is also against Dutch tourists kidnapping Belgians by luring them into their cars. The Belgians have no clue what a car is because they bike everywhere. The Dutch then do atrocities to the Belgians such as leaving them in a car on a mild day, not one that is too hot. This leaves the Belgian mildly uncomfortable for about 10 minutes. Belgians must be fed waffles, hands from congolese black people, and stimulation to federalize the EU, as it is the first original idea from Belgium since a machine to chop of black peoples' hands.

I bought a Belgian Lives Matter flag from isorrowproductions' sellout merch website.

Belgian Lives Matter by HandleBrake12 June 26, 2018

Belugatard 

Some annoying motherfucker thats 10 years old and uses discord all day all night and is sleep deprived because they're on belugas server and type some unfunny discord mod meme that died out months ago a Belugatard will usually go apeshit over opinions.

Father: you dont want to be like that guy
Son: who?
Father: The belugatard.
Son looks at belugatard
Belugatard in the distance: AHAHA NO MEMES IN GENERAL UWU IM A GIRL BTW ME WHEN I SEE A DISCORD MOD AND HE GIVES ME NITRO
Son vomits due to belugatards cringe.

Belugatard by Lolorator360 October 19, 2021

Belgacom 

Belgacom is one of the branches of the Belgian government. It collects taxes disguised as telecom services without providing said services.

The common misconception that Belgacom actually provides telecom services probably stems from the name (in which -com is actually short for "complete wankers"), their enormous headquarters in northern Brussels, and their invoices listing calls you never made and mysterious services you never received.

If you beg for long enough, Belcacom might actually connect you to the internet. Please note however that possessing a working internet connection is a criminal offense in Belgium and you will be fined accordingly.

Belgacom, embodying both Belgian political culture and customer service, has spawned a multitude of common expressions.

"He's in a Belgacoma" - All brain activity has ceased.

"That guy is Belgacompetent" - He can't tell his ass from his elbow.

"I went Belgacom on his ass" - I told him to fuck off and die.

Belgacum: an ejaculation caused by raping a customer.

Belgacomedy: conversation with a retarded person.

Belgacomfort: not being a Belgacom customer.

Belgacommerce: making a 500-million-euro yearly profit by selling nothing and doing nothing.

Belgacomplacency: turning a blind eye to openly criminal activities.

Belgacomplaint: a complaint thrown in the bin without reading.

Belgacompound: giant headquarters built with money stolen from the masses.

Belgacomputer: a computer with no internet connection.

Belgacomrade: a graduate of Joseph Stalin's School of Customer Service.

Belgacom by Vieux Polack November 3, 2011

Belgacom 

A bunch of no-good thieving scumbags masquerading as a Telecomms company, BELGACOM is the largely state-owned Belgian quasi-monopoly internet, mobile and landline telephone outfit.

Employing over 16,000 ‘special’ children, Belgacom is internationally known for being the worse internet provider in the entire universe. A little old fashioned in ‘real’ countries, Belgacom persists with copper wire ADSL, a technology so old it is thought to have been invented by Jesus. It is understood the CEO’s office is stuck in a time vortex that convinces everyone inside that the year is 1608, hence no optical fibre.

Belgacom, or Belgacunt as it is widely known, makes you wait up to 500 years for an internet connection. Installation, which costs €149 and takes only 10 minutes, is performed by a fuckwit circus monkey.

The cretins on the customer hatred line (Belgacunt is well known for not having a 'support line'), only speak in daego. All other languages will be ignored. Well known for their rudeness, knowledge of their particular drawl is not required, as the only word that the cocky little marzipan dildos actually know is "non", which is the same in any language anyway.

Belgacunt was recently fined €500,000 for raising their prices without telling anyone, and the hope is that they will soon get fucked up by the EU commission, because in this day and age pubicly-owned telecomms companies are a bit old hat, particularly when the service is a little bit completely fucking abysmal!

"Man, I'd sure like to get revenge on Belgacom for that €250 bill they sent me for the ten minutes work they did in my house! Maybe I'll abuse them on the internet until I get my money back"

"96% say they would fuck Belgacom. Fuck them, those arrogant, incompetent bastards. I hope they get soddomised by their own fixed-landlines."

Belgacom by SoontobeaTelenetcustomer October 27, 2011

belgard

A loving, amorous, or affectionate glance.

I stole a belgard at my wife's big butt when she wasn't looking! Oh yeah, she's a keeper! 😋

belgard by talk2me-JCH2 August 24, 2022

Belgian Binoculars 

This is a variation off of the boston pancake in which the male partner defecates upon the chest of the other participant. However, instead of using the bottocks to pat down the steaming pile of shit, the testicles are used in their place. After the testicles have been adequately smothered in said feces they are plopped generously into the eye sockets of the willing partner. Note that the penis is not important in this position, simply drape it over the participants forehead and leave it be.

Sally and I were feeling pretty frisky the other day in school and decided to break out the belgian binoculars to spice things up a bit.

Belgian Binoculars by pseudonomical platypus September 1, 2013