This man is likely very insecure about his kinks. As of late, rumors have finally arisen about his attraction towards pumpkins. This insecurity has become considered his motivation for all of his prior and future homophobic comments. If this is the case, he must be very insecure about this; as he has gone out of his way to plan and advertise an anti-LGBT conference during pride week.
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.