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theancient 

a type of guy who isnt really active like a rock but is a beast online
theancient by degamer003 July 19, 2020
Urban Dictionary Merch

The Ancient Web 

The earliest sites and chunks of data that made up the first foundations of the world wide web. Data that has been lost to the depths of the internet and no longer retrievable.

In contemporary terms The Ancient Web is made up of the lost history of the internet sometimes view able on thewaybackmachine or other archives that exists in time before the fall of geocites.

The term will perpetually be changing to consume greater swaths of the history of the internet until clearly defined eras are identified.
"I remember a story from years ago, but it is lost to the ancient web."
The Ancient Web by Viroodiem October 29, 2018

ream of the ancient mariner

This requires the use of a dead albatross and a dirty old sailor. While engaged in doggystyle intercourse, tie the dead albatross around her neck, and while she is struggling to remove the filthy animal, quickly switch places with a dirty old sailor, who will give her a good jabbin' and the surprise of her life. Can be combined with the Rodeo. Perfect for breakup scenarios.
I wanted to end it with Jill, so I contracted a dirty old sailor, caught an albatross at the pier, and ended our relationship with a ream of the ancient mariner.

The Ancient Ones

The Ancient Rulers of the Darkness, in a time before Time, when no Light existed. They who were slain by The Elder Gods, namely Marduk, begotten son of The Father Enki; Marduk who is Lord of Lords and Magician of Magicians, First Born and Ruler of The Elder Gods, Fashioner of The Magic Name, The Magic Word, The Magic Number and The Magic Shape and were cast into the eternal Abyss, The Netherworld, called Hades and Absu.

From the blood of Kingu, Ruler of The Ancient Ones, was the race of Man created and from the fluids of the vile Serpent Tiamat were the Heavens, the Stars and the Earth created.

The Ancient Ones keep constant watch over The Gates of Absu, forever seeking enterance into Our World, so that They may rule the Earth.

Wicked are those magicians that are skilled that they may rouse The Ancient Ones and rouse The Serpent of The Deep Waters, known as Cthulhu, and grant them access into Our World.

Grant thyself power by The Names of Elder Gods by reading and following to the letter the formulae contained within the pages of The Necronomicon, known as The Book of The Black Earth and The Book of the Dead, brought to us from the teachings and scripts of Abdul Alhazarad, known by many as The Mad Arab, paying particular attention to those written down within the pages of The Maklu Text and The Book of The Calling.
The Elder Gods did War in Heaven with The Ancient Ones, so as to create Light out of Supreme Darkness and the Heavens and The Earth and all that dwell therein.
The Ancient Ones by E April 6, 2005

TEENANCIENT 

An older woman who dresses like a teenager
Look at Bridget...she'e 50 if she's a day....all dressed up in her boob tube and a pussy-pelmet.

Jeez, what a teenancient!
TEENANCIENT by Derderder August 19, 2012

the ancient ninja art of deep conditioning 

Uchiha Sasuke's way to keep his hair lookin' sexy. Naruto's way of making his hair weird and yellow
"i will use the ancient ninja art of deep conditioning to make my hair like sasuke-kun!"

Raise the Ancient Golden Cage 

The feeling that a proposed relationship with the opposite sex is only going to lead to trouble in all 8 directions. Comes from a Russian proverb about setting free a beloved bird.
Raise the Ancient Golden Cage, Jerry, that woman is not who you think she is.
More from Urban Dictionary
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026
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