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coaching from the sidelines 

A case of constipation so severe it leaves you talking to your shit to try & get it to come out.
One can be coaching from the sidelines in following manner;
"Who does number 2 work for?!"
"That's right, you tell that turd who's boss!"
Austin Powers I

The Sidewinder 

When a previously straight dick has been broken during violent intercourse and now has become bent. The recipient lays on her back while the guy with the broken dick lays on his side and performs sideways thrusts into her vagina.
"Dude that bitch fucked my cock up so bad last night all I'm gonna be able to do from now on is the sidewinder"
The Sidewinder by Dmay27 April 12, 2010

The Sidewinder Special 

The sidewinder special is that one night of the week that you get to hook up for sex with a guy that has a particularly large cock.
Her: So what did you do last night?
Them: I had the sidewinder special last night!
Her: Nice!