Surprise Dick

A person who at first seems very nice, but at a later time reveals that they are in fact a total dick.

Me: Mr. Johnson, will you please accept this paper? I only couldn't turn it in because my mom was in the hospital dying of cancer. You seem like a reasonable enough guy.

Mr. Johnson: SURPRISE! I'M A DICK!!!!

Me: Damn what a surprise dick

Surprise Dick by NICKBERT August 15, 2010

Double Dick Surprise 

A Double Dick Surprise is when teachers collaboratively give extremely excessive amounts of work all at once, usually before a break or vacation.

Aw man, all my teachers really gave me the ol' Double Dick Surprise right before spring break this year!

Double Dick Surprise by fireaway12 December 17, 2010

short dick surprise 

When an individual is provided with an external stimulus or situation that the individual does not want.

It is similar to a) suddenly finding that you have a shorter penis than previously (perhaps after swimming)

b) when a love removes his trousers and has a really short penis

"Marcus has to work on the weekend! That's awful."
"He sure does. He gets a lot of short dick surprises like that."

short dick surprise by Captain Hotpants September 18, 2015

shit dick surprise 

The wholesome, pleasant treat bestowed upon your penis after a hearty session of anal jackhammering. Often associated with fucking your girlfriend's ass for the first time, and her subsequent loss of spxincteral control. Also known as the chocolate fairy, fiber maiden, and the corn-covered lollipop.

Odell was really enjoying Ms. Profitt's ass, until the unforseen arrival of shit dick surprise. Then he was crushed by the tidal waves of her flapping ass cheeks.

shit dick surprise by Wheatus April 15, 2004

Nick Dick Surprise 

When you discover that one of your childhood friends is getting into gay porn and sending pictures of himself to gay porn producers.

Let's send Keith a nick dick surprise.

Nick Dick Surprise by Nick the Niggerfaggot January 11, 2008

dick surprise 

When it's bigger than u thought ((;
Or smaller than u thought )):

Last night had a special dick surprise for me..better than I thought.
Or
This morning he gave me a total dick surprise..his microscope couldn't even see it.

dick surprise by Fxcking.excplicit January 12, 2016

Dick Surprise 

The act of startling someone (preferably a spouse or partner) by placing your member on top of a door handle from a room they are about to exit. By doing this the first thing they see is dangus, as soon as door is fully open you yell "dick surprise" and run away. This usually results in a loud shriek and elevated heart rate. Probably not safe for the elderly or those with known heart conditions.

Trisha was not expecting there to be a large dong on the other side of the door. Upon seeing the meat Patrick yelled dick surprise and she shrieked and fainted.

Dick Surprise by Projectpat1983 November 23, 2016