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Masturbetes 

a common yet often undiagnosed disease normally developed in but not limited to the late teens, namely freshman year of college. Although it can be seen in the rare female case, Masturbetes affects mainly males. This disease causes the testicles to produce large amounts of semen and testosterone, thus causing a drastic peak in the sexual desire and arousal of the afflicted male, who is scientifically referred to as a Masturbetic. The most common treatment is excessive masturbation, usually accompanied by the viewing of pornographic materials. Another symptom is increased aggressive behavior towards the female sex mostly in an attempt to receive a sort of assisted treatment from said female. Rejection can lead to the Maturbetic engaging in further self-treatment. Ejaculation reduces elevated sexual desire and semen in Masturbetics, similar to how insulin shots decrease abnormally high blood sugar in diabetics. Severe cases call for around 3-5 rounds of intense treatment to curb desire and reduce the amount of semen to normal levels. Lubrication is advised in such cases to avoid irritation of the penile region.
"Dude...I just went to the doctor, and I got diagnosed with masturbetes..."

"That's why you jerk off so much! that sucks man"

"Not really, I got a doctor's note, and now that I'm a Masturbetic, I can slap my johnson in class"
Masturbetes by FroknKoko December 3, 2011

Masturbinge 

Masturbating as much as you can in a short period of time
“Yeah, man. My period is starting soon so i gotta masturbinge before it starts”
“Mood”
Masturbinge by Area Rug June 10, 2018

masturbible 

Substitute pornography used by religious people, for instance the section of the Sunday newspaper advertising section that contains ads for bras and panties, or the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition.
"Somebody left their masturbible in the bathroom..."
masturbible by Gatorpress December 10, 2007

masturbike 

masturbike
(v): to stroke one's shaft until semen is ejaculated from the penis. While riding an effing bike. Seriously.

Happens sometimes at Colorado College...

Possibly the most perverted act one could ever commit.
"Did you see that sick pedophile masturbiking while he passed by all of those eight year old children? He just loves to masturbike; it's his favorite pastime."
masturbike by bassist9999999 September 3, 2009

masturpiece 

a drawing used for visual aid during masturbation
While using the public restroom I saw a very sexy masturpiece on the wall that made me want to rub one out
masturpiece by Metaphorphosis July 29, 2018

Masturbise 

Improvised masturbation

what more do I need to say
When I was kidnapped i had my arms tied so i had to masturbise using my legs
More from Urban Dictionary

piddlefart

verb. To waste time doing nothing.
Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
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