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kleptopigia

n. An irresistible pathological desire to steal pigs or delicious parts of pigs, such as bacon. Usually considered untreatable.

.........................
Why is there ham hidden in every nook in your house? You still got that kleptopigia?

Get off my case! It’s in my nature!
by gnostic3 October 20, 2022
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Kleptophilia

A kleptomaniac who has an unhealthy, sexual compulsion to cum on the objects that they steal.
When I discovered that all the stolen merchandise was covered in a sticky substance, i realized that we weren't just dealing with Kleptomania, but also....Kleptophilia.
by Randy Farris April 26, 2011
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Kleptophiliac

A Abnormality/Mental disorder which involves stealing items from shops (Shoplifting) when a person does not actually need the item. But does it because they have the desire. Usually they find the feeling of stealing as satisfying as an Orgasm.
"Lucy is such a Kleptophiliac. She finds shop lifting better then Sex."
by Itwontletmepickaname April 18, 2006
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Kleptobicia

klɛp təˈ bik i ə
The irresistible urge to steal lighters from those around you. People with this disorder are compelled to borrow a lighter to light up, and consciously or unconsciously steals your lighter in the process. This disorder usually manifests at the bar, house party, or other large gathering of people and leads to frustration and bewilderment of other smoking guests.

Derives from Kleptomania + Bic (lighter brand)
Charlie: Hey William, can I borrow your lighter for a second?

Will: Sure

Will: <10 minutes later, slapping pockets> Where the Hell's my lighter gone?

Sarah: Ask Charlie, he's totally got kleptobicia
by Panda Brother July 18, 2011
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kleptopia

A place of theft, a den of thieves.
If the U.S. Congress is not a kleptopia, what is?

Well, ...Wall Street.

Wall Street is a MEGAkleptopia, you rube.
by Moby Doug December 25, 2010
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kleptopeniac

An irresistible urge to steal pens.
Toni's a kleptopeniac, she's got like 17 pens in her purse.
by Missylynn11 May 5, 2023
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