Skip to main content

jackwanker 

A person who acts as if they masturbate to themselves perpetually being bigoted jackasses, so as to overcompensate for their undoubtedly small penises.
Jackwanker 1: "Hur, hur, hur, he's craaazzzeee! HUR HUR!!"

Autistic person they're pointing to, under breath: "Ugh, what an asshole."

Jackwanker 2: "Hur hur, I'm an asshole furr bein' a bigot?! Hur hur PSYCHO!"

All jackwankers: *the furious sounds of their masturbation, followed by them stinking up the place with the miniscule droplets of cum that eventually leak out the tip of their micropenises*

Autistic person: *exasperated sigh*
jackwanker by finbarr.robespierre October 17, 2019

Jacklanderseedes 

Jacklanderseedes (Jack-lander-see-these) is a rare kind of emerald usually found in central park.
I found Jacklanderseedes!

jackwacker 

A person who sucks at life. They are incapable of performing basic and simple daily tasks (with the exception of masturbation).
You have your left turn signal on and are clearly trying to merge into the left lane; instead of slowing down to allow you to change lanes, the Jackwacker behind you speeds up to block your access. This guy is a complete Jackwacker; he sucks at life.
jackwacker by plokmijnuhbygv July 19, 2011

Jackzacker 

A homosexual activity, which involves an individual "Jacking off" a minimum of 10 other gentlemen in a single night/party/event. Only once all 10 men have ejaculated can the act be called a Jackzacker.
Brad: Last night at the club i Jacked off 15 blokes
Shane: thats a great Jackzacker-ing
Brad: yep once I hit 12 my right wrist got sore so I had to use left
Shane: is that a record?
Brad: yep my jackzacker record was 13 not its 15!

Jackhander

When a man grips his penis with both hands, fist over fist (requires substantially sized penis), and then has the partner grasp both of his forearms and create a motion similar to that of a jackhammer. A variation can be done by a woman holding a dildo.
Dude, that chick was crazy, she hopped on top and gave me the jackhander!
Jackhander by Jackman17 July 25, 2012

Stealthie 

when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.

This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"

FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"
Stealthie by gwenhyfar October 2, 2016
Word of the Day on May 25, 2026

Summer Teeth 

When someone has a lot of missing teeth.
Mannn, that dude has summer teeth!
What do you mean?
Summer here, summer there...
Summer Teeth by BeckPot August 2, 2012
Word of the Day on May 24, 2026