disastrabate

To masturbate to climax, using only footage of horrific natural disasters as pornography.

Bret: hey did you see the news last night? That tsunami killed like 300 people.

Chad: yeah man I TIVO'ed it so I can disastrabate when my wife leaves tonight.

by Moosedontcare November 5, 2015

Disasturbate

When your life is so shitty, all you can do is masturbate in sorrow and self-pity.

"What happened to Luke the other day?"

"I don't know man, but it must be pretty horrible - he just went to the other room to disasturbate."

by kOrEAn Bbq May 9, 2013

Disasturbate

Masturbating during a natural or otherwise any disaster.

The tornado is coming, I better disasturbate so I can too.

by Jawsh00 July 3, 2015

Disasterbate

v. The act of maserbating and someone interrupts the act, just at the point of climax but before the actual ejaculation, so you have no option but to just put your junk back in you pants and cum all over the the inside of your shorts.

Me: My mom walked in just as I was ejaculating. I had NO time to cum on anything so I just shoved everything back in my pants and came all over myself. what a disaster.

Friend: Dude, you disasterbated!! Hilarious!

by Dr. K. Moon November 19, 2010

Disasterbate

In the face of pending doom, man shuns only the quickest and most rewarding of activities. Disasterbation describes the carnal quest for the much-coveted preapocalyptic climax.

The second most satisfying of self-pleasuring activities, Disasterbation bows only to Faux Invigordisastpublation--publicly masturbating, with vigor, in anticipation of a miscalculated armageddon.

(see also: Dicksimation, Blastpocalypse, Cum Bucket List, Anal-Eye-alation, Catajysm, Catastrofeces, and Holocaustitution)

INTELLECTUAL 1: "My goodness, Intellectual 2, I dare say that, despite having immaculately worded definitions, the examples UrbanDictionary endorses often seem contrived in nature, unnecessarily abrupt, and leave one with a dearth of expounding information via general scenario, anecdote, or lexicon."

INTELLECTUAL 2: "Hear Hear, Intellectual 1! I ... OH! Gracious, is that an earthquake!?!? ... DISASTERBATE!"

by barfcake November 15, 2011

Disasterbate

When, after unsuccessfully attempting to pick up at the bar (or elsewhere), one returns home to masturbate... Generally while sobbing.

"I was chatting up this totally hot yoga instructor all night when she decides to mention that she has a boyfriend... So I basically had no choice but to head home alone and disasterbate."

by djwendo March 21, 2010

disasterbate

To direct more coverage at a disaster than is appropriate or necessary, in an attempt to gain viewers.

Man, FOX News sure disasterbated 9/11 for all it was worth.

by eric January 4, 2005