brandeis 

A very young university, founded in part by Albert Einstein, located a few miles outside of Boston that is quickly becoming comparable to great schools such as MIT, Harvard, and Dartmouth.

Dude, I just got into Brandeis! It's like Jewish Harvard! Except I'm not Jewish..

brandeis by calistud June 16, 2008

Brandeis 

To be weird or socially awkward around other people in normal settings. To make common mistakes.

Don: Did you see Jimmy fall down the stairs yesterday?
Brandon: He's so Brandeis.

Brandeis by animallover23132 September 20, 2022

Brandeis Goggles 

The phenomena experienced by Brandeis University students who, upon leaving campus, find nearly every single person they see to be extremely attractive. This is due to the overwhelmingly unattractive population of students at Brandeis. Students attracted to men are especially susceptible to this illness, as the men at Brandeis are even less attractive than the women.

Girl 1: Did you see that guy walking past? He was SO hot!
Girl 2: Honey, you need to take off your Brandeis Goggles. He was balding and fat at 20 years old.

Brandeis Goggles by unfortunatestudents October 8, 2011

brandeis university 

A school six miles west of Boston named after the first Jewish Supreme Court Justice, Louis D. Brandeis. The girls there aren't quite so hot, and they did produce Richard Rubin (runner-up of "Beauty and the Geek".) School motto is "truth unto its innermost parts," although the phrase "Bran-Po can suck my nuts" is a close second, followed by "Aramark swallows" as a distant third.

Brandeis is a predominantly Jewish school (hence the monopoly on awkwardness), yet manages to be less financially endowed then the other filthy rich colleges within an 8-mile radius. That just means Brandeis can be just as smart as Harvard and Tufts without the fanciness or pretentious airs the Ivys and Seven Sisters take for granted.

If Wellesley College, is Hogwarts, then Brandeis is the Xavier School for Gifted Youngsters--yes, it is populated by mutants, but as you can see, mutants can kick ass and be cool, too.

1: Dude, why can't Usdan be open earlier?
Reff: Hey Brandeis University student, would you like some cheese with that whine?

Non-Jew: Where's this party that everyone goes to on Friday nights?
Jew: It's called services?

brandeis university by LiveattheSchwarzenegger September 19, 2005

Brandeis Binary Scale 

The fact that girls at Brandeis don't fit a normal distribution, but a Bernoulli distribution when rated.
1 and 0. Fuckable or not.

Yeah man. It is impossible to rate girls at Brandeis. Over there, there is a binary scale. 1 and 0, either you want to fuck her or not. Famous as the Brandeis Binary Scale.

Brandeis Binary Scale by theboogeyboogeyman February 14, 2018

Brandeis AZA 

The coolest AZA chapter in the world. The colors are blue and white and it was founded in 1963. Brandeis is most well-known for having one of the longest serving advisors in BBYO history, Moish Hamburg.

Five-fold convention. Bravaa! Moishburgers

and most importantly Brandeis AZA

Brandeis AZA by pseudonym1519 June 1, 2011

Brandeis Shits 

the diarrhea one experiences after eating anything from the dining halls at Brandeis University, especially food from the Sherman dining hall

Person 1: Hey wanna go hang out?

Person 2: No I can't

Person 1: Why not?

Person 2: Brandeis Shits

Brandeis Shits by B-rabbit8293 October 6, 2011